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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people feel that playing computer games has a negative impact on children's health and social skills. Others say that it can have a positive impact on their lives. Discuss both these views

#people #computer #games #impact #children #health #skills #lives
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During
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childhood
childlihood
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childhood
,allowing
to
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apply
show examples
children to pick up the suitable entertainment is
the
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a
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 critical decision because
,
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apply
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being healthy and establishing social skills will be influencing
through
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apply
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how the
kids's
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kids'
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 spare time is going on ,some people argue and allege
computer
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games
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 will have
getting
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to get
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 a bad impression on reaching
proper
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the proper
a proper
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 level of health and will have declining social abilities , while others have optimism in
this
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 .So , I am going to
clarifying
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clarify
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 my status and agree with
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the pervious
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previous
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pervious
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previous
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 statement and am going to
providing
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provide
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 strong evidence to confirm
this
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 idea.
Firstly
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 ,Children's health means
to have
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having
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 nourishment the essential
comminucation
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communication
 abilities and having a good growth on
childlihood
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childhood
 which is directly related to the amount of activity and
expriencing
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experiencing
 the situations which each person can be able to solve the problems , so the
computer
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 game
distrupt
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disrupt
 these goals.
for example
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, It will be dominated
the
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by the
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 sedentary lifestyle and don't allow the child put in their peers.
In
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As
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result
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a result
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, there has
not
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no
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 time to
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develop
develope
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develop
 physical activity and
exercising
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exercise
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 to increase
the
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apply
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growth . Children's social skills will have
improving
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to improve
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 by
engaing
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engaging
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individual
indivisual
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individuals
 in
community
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the community
show examples
 and how they would deal with
the
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apply
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different
persons
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people
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, so the
computer
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games
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 will stop
such
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 connections and
reinforcing
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reinforce
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 the mood of
lonlyness
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loneliness
. To sum up , I would stand with
this
Linking Words
 side the disadvantages of
cmputer
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computer
games
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 has
greater
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a greater
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 negative effect on well-being and
commucation
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communication
 skills among
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children
childrens
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children
show examples
, so , the government and parents must apply laws to prevent from spreading the
computer
Use synonyms
games
Use synonyms
 as a core entertainment.
Submitted by homa.ebrahimi987 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • negative impact
  • physical health
  • obesity
  • eye strain
  • repetitive strain injuries
  • social skills
  • virtual worlds
  • face-to-face interactions
  • cognitive skills
  • problem-solving
  • strategic thinking
  • hand-eye coordination
  • educational tools
  • engaging
  • multiplayer
  • online gaming communities
  • relieve stress
  • entertainment
  • moderation
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