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Writing Samples
Band 4

Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the first punishment. Why is this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?

#offenders #crimes #first #punishment #measures
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While
offenders
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 are always punished everywhere, they tend to commit more
crimes
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. These are because of some severe malfunction Punishments and unimpressive ways of sentences which are implemented around the world, so it is necessary to find
effective
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an effective
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 approach to deal with these problems.
To begin
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 with, guilty men do
crimes
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 when they cannot find the right way in their life; not knowing why they did these
crimes
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, criminals try to learn more
crimes
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 from the other prisoners. Other prisoners are probably more familiar with other types of
crimes
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which
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wich
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which
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 can be learned by new
offenders
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 serving their
first
Linking Words
 punishment.
AS a result
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, they come out with an extensive range of bad experiences.
In addition
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, Most
of
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apply
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offenders
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the offenders
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 are people who had very gloomy childhood. The more you
aa
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as
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 a consultant speak with them, the more you can understand
harsh
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the harsh
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 situation in which they raised.
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Consequently
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,Consequently
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 if you want to treat them, you must help them to accept
their
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they're
they are
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suffers
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suffering
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 and handle it. Just in
this
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 way,
therefore
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, they may control themselves and take
actions
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action
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 to run their life.
Finally
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, severe punishment can take a big
roll
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role
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 on the personality of culprits, Punished so harsh and with violence,
offenders
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 try to revenge after coming
over
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out
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 of jail. They,
however
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, are aware of the negative results of their
crimes
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commit
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and commit
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the offence
an offence
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offence
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offences
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 to become happy and feel free. To conclude,
Although
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 there are some causes including not knowing their essence of problems, harsh
punshment
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punishment
punishments
 and being
Linking Words
besides
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beside
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 the other prisoners in prisons, by effective policy administers can be able to take
Measure
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Measures
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 to tackle
this
Linking Words
 issue in
community
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the community
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Submitted by m2010.science on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • recidivism
  • rehabilitation programs
  • social stigma
  • ex-convicts
  • reintegration
  • support systems
  • mental health issues
  • addiction problems
  • criminal networks
  • incarceration
What to do next:
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