Television has diminished the free time of people. It can make people lazy and not socialize with others. Do you agree or disagree?

#television #time #people

There is no doubt that these days,

is not

Correct your spelling

popular

popluar

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popular

theses

Correct your spelling

these

show examples

days,

as a result

, with

smartphone

Fix the agreement mistake

smartphones

show examples

people prefer to spend more time on

Add an article

the smartphone

a smartphone

show examples

smartphone

Fix the agreement mistake

smartphones

show examples

rather than

to spend

Change the verb form

spending

show examples

more time on

. The question is,

could create

the

Correct article usage

show examples

community lazy and not socialise with others and has diminished the free period of

community

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the community

a community

show examples

? In

this

essay

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,essay

show examples

I am going to discuss my pros and cons.

Change preposition

show examples

terms of the positive side, several communities prefer

watch

Add the particle

to watch

show examples

television

rather than go

Correct your spelling

outside

show examples

out side

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outside

show examples

as a result

, it makes them more comfortable and

releax

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relax

relaxed

. Another thing

Correct pronoun usage

that make

show examples

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

adults

people just stay at home and watch

television

, even though, it makes them more safety. The main reason given to support

this

claim is that

teenagers

are more

imbreased

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impressed

adults

society because they spend

whole

Add an article

the whole

a whole

show examples

day

at home and

watch

Wrong verb form

watching

show examples

In other words

, as well as I know the rate of watching

television

these days are less than

the

Change preposition

in the

show examples

past.

For instance

, the

peporation

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preparation

proportion

population

adults

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adult

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people is 83 per cent rather than

teenagers

are 17 per cent.

Moreover

teenagers

has

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have

show examples

the highest rate on

spend

Change the verb form

spending

show examples

whole

Add an article

the whole

show examples

time on

smartphone

Add an article

the smartphone

a smartphone

show examples

rather than

spend

Wrong verb form

spending

show examples

whole

Add an article

the whole

a whole

show examples

day

Change preposition

show examples

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

automation made

teenagers

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

intersting

Correct your spelling

interesting

Change preposition

show examples

smartphone

Add an article

a smartphone

the smartphone

show examples

as a result

, all things on

smartphone

can do

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

with

best

Correct article usage

the best

show examples

Correct your spelling

performance

performrnce

Correct your spelling

performance

. To sum up, it is evident

between

Change preposition

show examples

this

situation

adults

are

intersting

Correct your spelling

interesting

to watch

television

every

day

on the other hand

teenagers

prefer to spend

whole

Add an article

the whole

a whole

show examples

day

Add an article

a smartphone

the smartphone

show examples

smartphone

Fix the agreement mistake

smartphones

show examples

that

Correct pronoun usage

which

show examples

makes them more comfortable. Must

Correct your spelling

ensure

enshure

Correct your spelling

ensure

steps are taken to prevent

this

phenomenon from deteriorating future.

Submitted by nfalfaroki on Wed Jun 29 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
47Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

266 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

6.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Television has diminished the free time of people. It can make people lazy and not socialize with others. Do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people say that in order to be happy, you must have a job you love doing. Others say that other factors are more important Do you think that people can only be happy if they have a job they really enjoy?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others velieve they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Nowadays children prefer electronic games to other games and toys? Why is it happening? Is it a positive or negative development?

Some school leavers go travelling or work for a period of time instead of going directly to university. Do you think this has more advantages or disadvantages for their study?

Some people think that having people from different nationalities and cultural backgrounds living together in the same country develop faster. Do you agree or disagree?