Some believe that the Olympic games help bring people from different nations together, while others claim that holding the Olympics wastes money which could be used for important issues.

#believe #olympic #games #people #nations #olympics #wastes #money

The

Olympic

Games

are a famous sporting

event

held every four years, and thousands of athletes from different countries participate.

Thus

, leading up to the

event

, there is significant preparation to be done by the

host

country

Although

this

preparation is expensive, I believe that

overall

, the

Olympic

Games

are beneficial for the

host

country

. It is true that the

host

country

of the

Olympic

Games

must spend a large amount of money preparing for the

event

For example

, they need facilities for the many and varied sporting events

such

as rowing, athletics and gymnastics. The cost of constructing and renovating these facilities can be high. The Olympics

also

attracts many spectators from around the world

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

so providing adequate accommodation, food, and public transport for these visitors creates another expense for the

host

country

Nevertheless

, the advantages of hosting the

Olympic

Games

far outweigh these costs. The construction and renovation of sports facilities, public transport, and the development of the hospitality industry promote tourism in the

host

country

during and after the

Games

. The long-term financial return from

this

boost in tourism means that the initial expense is a highly worthwhile investment.

In addition

, the organisation of the

event

requires additional human resources, with a variety of skills.

Thus

, hosting the

Olympic

Games

creates new jobs for local people. In conclusion, even though there are high costs associated with organising the

Olympic

Games

overall

, it has a positive effect on the

host

country

both in the short-term and long-term as it encourages tourism and generates jobs for local people.

Submitted by adedayoadesewa1 on Wed Jun 29 2022

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task response

The essay responds effectively to the task by discussing both sides of the argument and providing a clear opinion. Make sure to elaborate on the opposing view slightly more to further strengthen the response.

coherence cohesion

The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Improve coherence by using transition words more consistently to connect ideas and improve flow.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

260 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some believe that the Olympic games help bring people from different nations together, while others claim that holding the Olympics wastes money which could be used for important issues.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries, more and more people choose to buy imported food rather than food produced locally. Why people buy imported food? what could be done to encourage people to buy local food.

ore and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

Some believe that more young people hold the important positions in government, while others believe that the young people should not. Discuss both views and provide your own opinion with relevant examples.

The most effective way to solve the current traffic and pollution problem in cities is to encourage people to move from suburbs and countryside into the city centre. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outwigh the disadvantages?