Some believe that the Olympic games help bring people from different nations together, while others claim that holding the Olympics wastes money which could be used for important issues.

#believe #olympic #games #people #nations #olympics #wastes #money

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The

Olympic

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Games

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are a famous sporting

event

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held every four years, and thousands of athletes from different countries participate.

Thus

Linking Words

, leading up to the

event

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, there is significant preparation to be done by the

host

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country

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Although

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this

Linking Words

preparation is expensive, I believe that

overall

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, the

Olympic

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Games

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are beneficial for the

host

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country

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. It is true that the

host

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country

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of the

Olympic

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Games

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must spend a large amount of money preparing for the

event

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For example

Linking Words

, they need facilities for the many and varied sporting events

such

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as rowing, athletics and gymnastics. The cost of constructing and renovating these facilities can be high. The Olympics

also

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attracts many spectators from around the world

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

so providing adequate accommodation, food, and public transport for these visitors creates another expense for the

host

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country

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Nevertheless

Linking Words

, the advantages of hosting the

Olympic

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Games

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far outweigh these costs. The construction and renovation of sports facilities, public transport, and the development of the hospitality industry promote tourism in the

host

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country

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during and after the

Games

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. The long-term financial return from

this

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boost in tourism means that the initial expense is a highly worthwhile investment.

In addition

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, the organisation of the

event

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requires additional human resources, with a variety of skills.

Thus

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, hosting the

Olympic

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Games

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creates new jobs for local people. In conclusion, even though there are high costs associated with organising the

Olympic

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Games

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overall

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, it has a positive effect on the

host

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country

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both in the short-term and long-term as it encourages tourism and generates jobs for local people.

Submitted by adedayoadesewa1 on Wed Jun 29 2022

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task response

The essay responds effectively to the task by discussing both sides of the argument and providing a clear opinion. Make sure to elaborate on the opposing view slightly more to further strengthen the response.

coherence cohesion

The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Improve coherence by using transition words more consistently to connect ideas and improve flow.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

260 words

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Some believe that the Olympic games help bring people from different nations together, while others claim that holding the Olympics wastes money which could be used for important issues.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people believe that the government should be responsible for transporting students to school, while others believe that parents should bring their children to school. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

There days, many people like to watch live performances (such as shows or concerts) at home, either on TV or on a computer, instead of attending in person. Do the advantages of this trend outweigh its disadvantages?

Some people say that industrial growth is necessary to solve poverty, but some other people argue that industrial growth should be stopped. Discuss both views.

Online education is becoming more and more popular. Some people claim that e-learning has so many benefits that it will replace face-to-face education soon. Others say that traditional education is irreplaceable. Discuss both views and give your opininon.

Modern technology is now very common in most workplaces. How do you think has changed the way we worked? Do you think there are disadvantages to relying too much on technology?