Some people believe that studying online is more effective than studying on campus while others disagree. Discuss both views.

In the past few years, many youngsters are inclined towards studying online rather than attending physical
class
Fix the agreement mistake
classes
show examples
in colleges. There are several
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
why youth tend to follow
this
trend . In
this
essay, we will discuss both views and give our opinion. There are two primary
reason
Change to a plural noun
reasons
show examples
why studying online is more convenient rather than attending
campus
as
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it saves time and as well as money.
Students
do not have to travel in order to attend the lecture or tutorial.
For example
,
pupil
Fix the agreement mistake
pupils
show examples
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
can simply log in to their universities website to study.
Secondly
Add a comma
,Secondly
show examples
students
can
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
record voice or video while studying and they can watch it later at their own pace for better understanding.
On the other hand
,
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
there are many essential
benefit
Change to a plural noun
benefits
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
campus
education that cannot get from
from
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
e-studies. Unlike self-studies,
students
can get hands-on experiences
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
particular
Add an article
a particular
show examples
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
such
as chemistry it is important to do lab
exercise
Fix the agreement mistake
exercises
show examples
to gain more knowledge which would help them to understand how
chemical
Fix the agreement mistake
chemicals
show examples
used
Add a missing verb
are used
show examples
and react in different conditions. Another
benefit
is,
studying
Correct word choice
that studying
show examples
on
campus
allows collaboration with other pupils which would not be possible to do online. It is irrefutable that a student should not only learn course materials but
also
learn how to be a team player as well. Since
universities
Change the noun form
university
show examples
education includes project work as should be completed as a team, it helps to improve team player skills.
Therefore
, studying on
campus
is more efficient as it provides more
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
to the youth. To
sumup
Correct your spelling
sum up
, by considering the aforementioned points, I believe that
campus
learning is more
benefit
Replace the word
beneficial
show examples
to the
students
which cannot
obtained
Change the verb form
be obtained
show examples
when studying alone.
Submitted by niaakash on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • online education
  • flexibility
  • accessibility
  • enhancing learning experiences
  • online platforms
  • self-discipline
  • motivation
  • structured environments
  • democratize education
  • broader audience
  • social interaction
  • internet connectivity
  • screen fatigue
  • on-campus experiences
What to do next:
Look at other essays: