In the past, many male leaders have led our society to conflicts and violence. The world would be better governed and more peaceful if it was ruled by women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#leaders #society #conflicts #violence #world #women

There are

controversias

Correct your spelling

controversies

controversial

heating a debate over which genders can be better world

leaders

. While history has shown that male

leaders

often produce bad results, can a world

led

Change the verb form

lead

show examples

by women become more tranquil? In my opinion, judging a person's

leadership

ability based on their

gender

can lead to erroneous judgments and above all, these two factors are not necessarily compatible with each other.

First

gender

has no result in

leaders

' decision-making but rather

with

Change preposition

show examples

the goals and perspectives they aim for. In fact, people tend to follow a

leader

because they see their

leadership

and power as good and fair, allowing the perception that these

leaders

are doing the right thing. not because of their sexual orientation. We all hear about outstanding religious

leaders

of different genders and they all bring benefits to the people like Queen Victoria, former US president Barack Obama, German chancellor Angela Merkel, etc.

Therefore

, a

leader

's talent in leading a community does not depend much on the

gender

they carried.

Besides

, we often judge a

leader

's ability based on

gender

characteristics, but

leadership

skills are the main determining factor. According to some theories, whether a person has the opportunity to be an excellent

leader

or not depends on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

charismatic

leadership

Therefore

, in order to be able to hold a position with important public responsibility, it does not matter whether a

leader

is male or female

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but relates to outstanding skills to lead society.

Conclusion

Change preposition

In conclusion

show examples

, the statements about the relationship between

leadership

capacity and the

gender

leaders

are unproven, making an assessment based on sexual orientation factors may lead to inaccurate speculation.

Thus

, I believe that the people who can bring peace to the world will be the ones who stand out and not follow a negative standard.

Submitted by hominhtrang995 on Sat Jul 02 2022

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

294 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.5

Complete response

5.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

male-dominated leadership
empathetic
cooperative
inclusive society
governance
diversity
sustainable peace
social welfare
collaborative approach
international relations
leadership qualities
decision-making processes

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In the past, many male leaders have led our society to conflicts and violence. The world would be better governed and more peaceful if it was ruled by women. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Example 6: Many offenders commit more crimes after serving the punishment. Why are this happening, and what measures can be taken to tackle this problem?

If financially possible, is it always better for young people to leave home and be independent at the age of 18, do you agree or disagree?

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