IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

In today’s competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parents’ absence. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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In
this
Linking Words
 contemporary epoch,
parents
Use synonyms
 working for their
children
Use synonyms
's bright future is common.
This
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 has become a topic of debate, as some are in favour of working couples, while
other
Correct pronoun usage
others
show examples
 think that
children
Use synonyms
 should get appropriate time with their
parents
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. It is analysed that working
parents
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 can provide
bright
Correct article usage
a bright
show examples
 future in respect of the funds the students require for higher studies, whereas lack of time spent can demoralize the young ones. Both
parents
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 working have become the need of the hour, as there is a steady rise in inflation.
Moreover
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, university education is becoming costlier, so it becomes paramount to cope with the dearness rate.
For instance
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, bachelor of technology cost was 1 lakh rupee in 2010, whereas it surpassed 2 lakh in 2022. So it becomes valuable for
parents
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 to work
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
shifts for the bright forthcoming of their
children
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. Whereas, the most hours spent without their
parents
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 can lower the
Correct your spelling
morale
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moral
Correct your spelling
morale
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 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
adolescents.
Becasue
Correct your spelling
Because
,
teenager
Add an article
the teenager
a teenager
show examples
 is the most important duration of any human, as it is making or breaking period.
Moreover
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,
parents
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 should be close to their
children
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, as they have many ambitions and problems which can be only shared with people, with whom younger one thinks, they are comfortable
with
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apply
show examples
.
Thus
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,
parents
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 should spend some valuable
moment
Fix the agreement mistake
moments
show examples
, especially in the teenage phase of their child, as it would be helpful in
support
Add an article
the support
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 they require. To summarize, it has become important to work for the wealth required for their
children
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's bright forthcoming, but on the other ,hand giving the proper support and time to their young ones is
also
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 important.
Therefore
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, it should be a balance between both, as earning money will bring no outcome, if the child is not ready to continue his or her higher study.

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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