Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

#people #advertisements #products #lives

Nowadays, there are many kinds of advertisements on television.

Furthermore

, on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

social media

such

as Facebook, Twitter, Instagram etc. They know what we want while we

talking

Wrong verb form

talk

show examples

with friends and

then

pop up on the feed. I will examine by considering

the

Change the word

show examples

obvious opinions of mine on both viewpoints. In my opinion,

Add an article

the advertisement

an advertisement

show examples

can encourage people to buy things easily when we

are usually see

Change the verb form

usually see

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

Correct your spelling

hear

show examples

here

Correct your spelling

hear

show examples

the story about

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

like I just tell you above that

Correct pronoun usage

they

show examples

pop

Change the verb form

pops

show examples

up on all types of

your

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

social media applications after you searched for them.

For example

, if you want running shoes and you google

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

, a few minutes later, you

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

open Facebook apps and see

Correct pronoun usage

them

show examples

on the feed immediately.

Moreover

, It will show up for several days which

making

Wrong verb form

makes

show examples

us buy it even at the time you exactly do not need it. And I personally think that people will buy an unnecessary thing without reason especially with women while having a period, mood swing,

truama

Correct your spelling

trauma

, mental health break down or PMS. From my

experience

Add a comma

,experience

show examples

I often shop online when I got insomnia in the middle of the night and can not sleep but I did not want it at all, just buy it that's all. On the other viewpoint, I think It is true but I disagree that new products can improve our lives. Some kinds of advertising are too much and surreal.

Moreover

, the quality of product materials

are

Change the verb form

show examples

unwealthy as a price. In conclusion, I

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agree

show examples

agree

Add the preposition

onagree

toagree

withagree

show examples

the

first

viewpoint that other people said that advertising encourages us easier buy stuff,

although

It is unimportant.

Submitted by patty cool on Mon Jul 04 2022

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Fully explain your ideas

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

271 words

4.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.5

Complete response

4.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

encourage
persuade
manipulative
unnecessary
excessive
artificial needs
desires
consumers
oversaturation
impulse buying
financial problems
inform
educate
features
benefits
innovations
raise awareness
social issues
positive behavior
enrich
well-being

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Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

Fully explain your ideas

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countriyside is decreasing. Do you think it is a positie or nagative development?

Many people believe that we should protect all wild animals while others believe we should just protect some of them. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The best way to solve the traffic congestion in the city is to provide free public transport for 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. To what extent do you agree or disagree?