Some people think that a high salary is important when choosing a company to work for, while others think that a good working atmosphere is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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There is no doubt that working individuals spend their most of time in offices.
While
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

some
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

believe that
good
Correct article usage
a good

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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working
environment
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is important when choosing
organization
Add an article
an organization
the organization

The noun phrase organization seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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,
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others

It seems that other may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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believe that
Correct article usage
a

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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higher salary is important. In
following
Correct article usage
the following

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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paragraphs
Add a comma
paragraphs,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase In following paragraphs. Consider adding a comma.

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I will discuss both views and state why I support the former argument. Some
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

think that when choosing
organization
Correct article usage
an organization

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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inquire about their work culture.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is because they think mental health is vital. If the working
environment
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is good
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

the employee can focus on work properly,
productivity
Correct word choice
and productivity

It seems that conjunction use may be incorrect here.

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will increase resulting in better performance.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, Sweden companies
focuses
Change the verb form
focus

The singular verb focuses does not appear to agree with the plural subject companies. Consider changing the verb form for subject-verb agreement.

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more on employee health and their mental
well being
Add a hyphen
well-being

It seems that well being is missing a hyphen. Consider adding the hyphen(s).

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.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

resulted in
41
Correct article usage
a 41

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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% hike in their business sales because when employers provide
good
Correct article usage
a good

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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working
environment
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

employees are happy and they try to put
their
Change preposition
in their

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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best effort to complete the task.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it is better to choose
Add an article
a
the

The noun phrase company seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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company which provides good working conditions.
On the other hand
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, Some
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

think that higher wages are important.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is because if they get good salaries they can buy their favourite things and
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

focus more on the task. If they were paid less
then
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

they are distracted looking for new opportunities and not able to focus on
job
Correct article usage
the job

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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properly. For example,
recent
Add an article
a recent

The noun phrase recent survey seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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survey shows that the reason that
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

are focusing more on
the
Correct article usage
apply

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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salaries is that they want to maintain certain life
standard
Fix the agreement mistake
standards

It seems that standard may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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or buy some luxurious things.
As a result
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
people
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

focusing
Wrong verb form
focus

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb focusing. Consider changing it.

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more on wages when selecting
company
Add an article
a company
the company

The noun phrase company seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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. In conclusion,
above-mentioned
Correct article usage
the above-mentioned

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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paragraphs contain both sides of view, and I think a good working
environment
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is necessary.

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Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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