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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think that the best way to learn about business is to study a course at college or university. Others believe that there are other better ways to learn about business. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays, we can learn more about the knowledge of information that we are interested in, so some individuals agree that we should learn about commerce at
business
Use synonyms
school
Punctuation problem
school,
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although
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 some of them suggest that there are a lot of ways to learn about it. In the following paragraphs, both of these viewpoints and my opinion will be discussed in detail. On the one hand, learning
business
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 in the classroom, many experts will teach you all of the fundamentals of the knowledge
which
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, which
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 can save you much more time compared with
you have
Wrong verb form
having
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 to learn it on your own.
For instance
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,
If
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if
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 you want to learn something that you have never known before, it will be easier for you if someone who is an expert in that thing teaches you.
On the other hand
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, a better
of
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way of
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 learning
Use synonyms
business
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apply
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is learning from your
mistake
Fix the agreement mistake
mistakes
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 when you do commerce in a real situation in which you cannot control anything
but
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, but
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 can learn from your experience. These challenges that you face through industrial experience have more value to your career growth Personally, I think
,
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apply
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 teachers will share with you their experiences that will be beneficial to you in the future.
Moreover
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, students can ask their professors various questions during their classes
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as
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, as
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 well as try to tackle different real cases of huge corporations.
For example
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, when they want to teach you how to do
business
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 on an electronic commerce platform. They will let you do it on your own on your mobile phone’s application and give
recommendation
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recommendations
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 about it.
To conclude
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,
although
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 it is undeniable that you can gain experience from running a
business
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, the basic idea of entrepreneurship is
also
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 important. I am of the opinion that you can take their lesson about running the
business
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 and
adapting
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apply
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 it in your future.

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structure
Plan each idea. Start with a clear topic sentence for each paragraph.
language
Use short, simple sentences. Check hard words and spelling.
content
Keep your view clear. State your own view in one line and then add support.
content
Add one or two real examples and say why they show your point.
structure
The essay shows both sides of the topic.
content
It ends with a view of the writer, which is good.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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