IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

✅ Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high education

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In recent years, there has been considerable debate over whether unpaid
community
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service
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 should be a mandatory component of high school
education
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. Proponents argue that it
instills
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instils
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 social responsibility and enhances
students
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’ skills,
while
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 opponents believe that compulsory volunteering contradicts the very essence of
service
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.
While
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community
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service
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 offers undeniable benefits, I firmly believe that it should be encouraged rather than
enforce
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enforced
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. One of the most compelling arguments in
favor
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favour
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 of mandatory
community
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service
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 is its role in fostering social responsibility among young people. By engaging in activities
such
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 as assisting the elderly, tutoring underprivileged
students
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, or participating in environmental initiatives,
students
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 develop empathy and a broader understanding of societal challenges. These experiences not only contribute to personal growth but
also
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 create a generation of socially conscious individuals who are more likely to contribute positively to society in the long run.
Furthermore
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,
community
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service
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 provides
students
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 with valuable real-world experience. It enhances critical skills
such
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 as teamwork, leadership, and problem-solving—qualities that are highly sought after by universities and employers.
For instance
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,
students
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 who volunteer in healthcare settings gain early exposure to medical professions,
while
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 those involved in environmental projects develop an awareness of sustainability issues. These hands-on experiences complement academic learning, making
students
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 more well-rounded individuals. Despite its advantages, making
community
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service
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 a compulsory requirement raises significant concerns.
Firstly
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, forcing
students
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 to participate in unpaid work may lead to resentment rather than genuine engagement. Volunteering should stem from intrinsic motivation rather than obligation. If
students
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 view it as a burden, they may approach their tasks with minimal effort, ultimately diminishing the intended impact of
such
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 initiatives.
Additionally
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, many
students
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 already face demanding academic schedules, extracurricular commitments, and, in some cases, part-time jobs. Adding mandatory
community
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service
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 to their workload could increase stress levels and negatively affect their academic performance.
Education
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 should be structured to support
students
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’ development rather than impose excessive demands that may hinder their well-being.
Lastly
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, compelling
students
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 to work without pay raises ethical concerns.
While
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community
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service
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 aims to promote altruism, it may inadvertently exploit
students
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, particularly in organizations that would
otherwise
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 employ paid workers.
This
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 could create an unfair
labor
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labour
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 dynamic where
students
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 are required to contribute their time without appropriate recognition or compensation. Rather than imposing compulsory
service
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, a more effective approach would be to integrate voluntary participation into the
education
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 system through incentives. Schools could offer academic credits, certificates, or public recognition to encourage
students
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 to engage in
community
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 work willingly. By fostering a culture of voluntary
service
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 rather than coercion,
students
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 are more likely to develop a genuine passion for helping others
While
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 unpaid
community
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service
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 has undeniable benefits in shaping responsible and well-rounded individuals, it should not be a compulsory requirement in high school
education
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. Encouraging voluntary participation through incentives and awareness campaigns is a more effective strategy. Ultimately, true altruism cannot be mandated—it must come from within.

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task achievement
The argument structure is strong and logically organized, but consider providing a more thorough exploration of the counterarguments to balance your points more effectively.
task achievement
Your conclusion effectively sums up your viewpoint, but you might consider expanding it slightly to reiterate the importance of community service in society.
coherence cohesion
While your essay flows well, try to use more cohesive devices (e.g., linking words) to enhance the progression of ideas between sentences and paragraphs.
task achievement
You have a clear, concise thesis statement that outlines your stance from the beginning.
task achievement
Your examples are relevant and illustrate your points effectively, contributing to the overall clarity of your argument.
coherence cohesion
Your use of varied vocabulary and sentence structures makes the essay engaging and easy to read.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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