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Band 3.5

Some people think that activities during the free-time should be planned while others disagree. Discuss both sides and include examples and relevant data from your own experience.

#people #activities #free-time #data
In
modern
Correct article usage
the modern
show examples
 era
time
 is very precious.it would never come again.many individuals believe that action during their free while should be planned whereas remaining opposed to
this
.I will discuss both the views in upcoming paragraphs According to the former ,statement there are ample reasons that support my back.It helps to save the present.
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 mean to say that at present climate masses have to extra
time
 for planning any life.so in the free
time
 they can't waste their point and they should make planing for new action.
for example
,among
Add an article
the
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young generation They have no.
time
 for their
Correct your spelling
activities
activity
activitie
Correct your spelling
activity
 so it helps to encourage
for
Correct pronoun usage
them for
show examples
 doing
this
 activity.
Hence
,they
Correct your spelling
manage
show examples
menage
Correct your spelling
manage
show examples
 their
time
 easily and get success easily in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life. Apparently,some folks disagree with
this
 idea.The primary reason is they lose their thinking ability.To explain it,some folks are mentally disturbed.so they are already tired
for
Change preposition
of
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 doing their job as well as they want some free
time
 to get rest.And they think if folks think about enterprise and make planing for other activities so ,
definitely
Add a comma
,definitely
show examples
 they lose their power of thinking.
Thus
,it
is
Change the verb form
does not advantage
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not
Correct your spelling
no
show examples
 advantage for
young
Add an article
the young
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 generation and it
produce
Change the verb form
produces
show examples
wrong
Change the article
the wrong
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 effect on them. To conclude,both
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
views are equal.there has no difference between them. But I stand with the former statement because
turn
Add an article
the turn
show examples
 is the key to success.so don't
wasted
Change the verb form
waste
show examples
 the turn.
Submitted by godarashivam2 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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