IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

several languages are in danger of extinct because they are spoken by very small number of people. some people say tgat governments should spend public money on saving these languages, while others believe taht would be a waste of money. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

#languages #danger #people #tgat #governments #money #taht #waste
Nowadays, only
few
Change the article
a few
show examples
languages
 are spoken remaining ancient and
culture
Replace the word
cultural
show examples
languages
 are rarely spoken.few
people
 believe that
Correct your spelling
administration
Correct article usage
the adminstration
show examples
adminstration
Correct your spelling
administration
 should spend
money
 to stay alive meanwhile others
Correct your spelling
argue
agree
agrue
Correct your spelling
argue
 that would be
waste
Correct article usage
a waste
show examples
 of
money
. Both these aspects will be discussed with relevant
idea
Fix the agreement mistake
ideas
show examples
 and examples. On the one hand, advancement in
people
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
 in teenagers influenced to famous
languages
 only rather than mother
tounge
Correct your spelling
tongue
 because
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
 wants to look
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
modern
for instance
 today most of the countries speak English either in communication and
written
Change the form of the verb
writing
show examples
 as well as in their native places.
Moreover
, governments could provide teaching centres in individual society and encourage citizens towards learning native tongue
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
results
to
Change preposition
in
show examples
 passion in
crowd
Add an article
the crowd
a crowd
show examples
 to adopt new
languages
On the other hand
, many believe that spending
money
 could be
Correct article usage
a waste
show examples
waste
Correct your spelling
wasted
show examples
. There are two
manin
Correct your spelling
main
 reasons.
Firstly
, most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
Add an article
the people
show examples
 have opted and speak
international
Correct article usage
an international
show examples
language
such
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 English and
also
 utilise these in their workplace and at home because, today's youth
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
this
 kind of
language
 likely to help in future in
constarct
Correct your spelling
contact
contract
 with
native
Correct pronoun usage
their native
show examples
.
Secondly
,
organization
Fix the agreement mistake
organizations
show examples
 need their employees to speak
only
Add an article
an only
the only
show examples
single
Correct article usage
a single
show examples
language
 which helps
development
Add an article
the development
show examples
 of companies.
Although
, if
admistration
Correct your spelling
administration
 spend
money
 for
languages
 as a consequence to poor results. In conclusion, in my perspective
people
 should use their native
language
 compare to other because it keeps their mother
Correct your spelling
tongue
tounge
Correct your spelling
tongue
 alive.
However
, if
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 wants to change there will be slight changes to
Correct article usage
the live
show examples
live
Replace the word
life
show examples
 of
languages
Submitted by mohdasad5559 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: