3. Some people think that it should be mandatory for student to perform unpaid community service to graduate

Nowadays,
Many
Fix capitalization
many
show examples
people
suggest that social
activities
such
as cleaning
Add an article
the garden
show examples
garden
Fix the agreement mistake
gardens
show examples
and teaching younger
people
should
be include
Change the verb form
be included
show examples
to study courses. While some other think
this
Change the determiner
this activity
these activities
show examples
activities
may make some student feels
stresses
Wrong verb form
stressed
show examples
. From my point of view, I agree with the latter view. In the following paragraphs, the reason to support my opinion will be discussed in detail.
Initially
, unpaid community service has many advantages. It
promote
Change the verb form
promotes
show examples
social skills
for instance
communication skill and time management skill. Because
the
Correct your spelling
they
show examples
have to communicate with many
people
.
Moreover
Add a comma
,Moreover
show examples
It enhances
self-confident
Replace the word
self-confidence
show examples
when
pupil
Fix the agreement mistake
pupils
show examples
do
Change the verb form
does
show examples
volunteering
Wrong verb form
volunteer
show examples
.
For
example
Add a comma
,example
show examples
singing for
donate
Replace the word
donations
show examples
and teaching
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
poor children.
The society
Correct article usage
Society
show examples
will gain a lot of
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
from
this
Correct determiner usage
these
show examples
activities
.
On the other hand
, Putting social
activities
in study courses may cause more
drawback
Fix the agreement mistake
drawbacks
show examples
than
Add an article
an advantage
show examples
advantage
Fix the agreement mistake
advantages
show examples
. Because the student
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
main duties to do
such
as doing homework,
examine
Wrong verb form
examining
show examples
and
studying
Change the form of the verb
study
show examples
. After
that
Add a comma
,that
show examples
it will reduce their energy by doing
this
program.
Moreover
Add a comma
,Moreover
show examples
they do not have time to find what they
actually
Add a missing verb
are actually
show examples
interest
Wrong verb form
interested
show examples
that
Change preposition
in that
show examples
important
Add a missing verb
is important
show examples
for their future. Another reason is the government should responsible for their real duties
that is
provide
Fix the infinitive
to provide
show examples
facilities to
people
who really need
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
and manage our societies better or support social
activities
by making
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
campaign for persuading
people
who really want to do
this
. In conclusion, unpaid community service should not be a graduation requirement.
Although
it
promote
Change the verb form
promotes
show examples
many skills for student, it
reduce
Change the verb form
reduces
show examples
time and energy for them. So it
suitable
Add a missing verb
is suitable
show examples
for
people
who actually want to do it. And the government should be
a
Change the article
the
show examples
main part to support
this
project.
Submitted by r.pattaa on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: