IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 2.5

In the developed world, average life expectancy is increasing. What problems will this cause for individuals and society? Suggest some measures that could be taken to reduce the impact of ageing populations.

#world #life #expectancy #individuals #society #measures #impact #populations
The diagrams illustrate the current and future layouts of an industrial area in Norbiton. As is shown clearly in the maps, it can be found that there will be a total of eight significant changes
make
Change the form of the verb
made
show examples
 to
this
 place. The most noticeable
one
 relates to the construction of
housings
Fix the agreement mistake
housing
show examples
. Looking at the graphs in detail, there is a roundabout in the centre and five factories are standing across the path which extends
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
further
 east.
However
, they will be replaced by three housing areas,
one
 playground and
one
 school
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
plan. A medical centre, shops and the other three housing areas will be built in the original place of three factories which near the roundabout. It is worthy to note that a small roundabout will be
Correct your spelling
constructed
contructed
Correct your spelling
constructed
 to the south of the big
one
. Apart from the changes in
south
Add an article
the south
show examples
 of the river, a bridge jutting over the river to connect the south and north of the industrial area is
also
 a part of the plan.
Moreover
, a strip of housing area will be built in the place of farmland.
As a result
, the farmland decreases in size to almost half of its current size.
Submitted by 3071334368 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • average life expectancy
  • developed world
  • increase
  • individuals
  • society
  • personal goals
  • ambitions
  • quality of life
  • leisure
  • recreation
  • healthcare costs
  • challenges
  • healthcare system
  • ageing population
  • shortage
  • available workers
  • economy
  • retirement planning
  • healthy lifestyles
  • investing
  • social support systems
What to do next:
Look at other essays: