IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Topic: Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views.

#topic #people #university #college #route #career #job #school
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After
the
Correct article usage
apply
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high school
Use synonyms
education
Add a comma
,education
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 students encounter two main options: going to university or getting a job. Some people think that candidates who are new graduated should start college whereas a number of citizens assert finding work is better than college. It seems to me that
two
Correct article usage
the two
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 choices which are cited above have advantages and disadvantages.
In
Change preposition
This
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this
Linking Words
 essay will be discussed these choices. On the one hand, universities supply many opportunities to the students for successful careers
such
Linking Words
 as being a lawyer, teacher or politician. At the same time, these kinds of jobs are beneficial for society due to
Correct article usage
the needs
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needs
Fix the agreement mistake
need
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of
Change preposition
for
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 high qualified occupations.
For example
Linking Words
, a student who chose the pursuing
Correct article usage
a collage
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Correct your spelling
college
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collage
Correct your spelling
college
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education
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 could receive
bachelor
Change noun form
bachelor's
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degrees
Fix the agreement mistake
degree
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 from school became a doctor and could serve for
public
Add an article
the public
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.
Therefore
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,
university
Correct article usage
a university
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education
Use synonyms
 is quite important for getting spectacular
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, employees who are subsequence of
highschool
Correct your spelling
high school
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 starting work, have been evaluated by numerous
expert
Fix the agreement mistake
experts
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 as essential figures
of
Change preposition
in
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 the labour market.
For instance
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, many sectors which do not require diverse talent, need nonqualified workers.
Moreover
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, employers who held the basic jobs can not offer work to
high
Replace the word
highly
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 qualified people.
Hence
Linking Words
, getting a job after
the
Correct article usage
apply
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secondary
education
Use synonyms
 valuable as going to university. Should be considered that many people can find
Add an article
a job
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job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
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 easily rather than qualified workers. To conclude, both options are very important for the benefit of
community
Add an article
the community
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 and each choice
submit
Change the verb form
submits
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different
Correct article usage
a different
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 career opportunity.
Thus
Linking Words
, options should be prefered by candidates for their tendencies and there
are
Change the verb form
is
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not
Correct your spelling
no
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an
Correct article usage
apply
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inequality between the two choices mentioned before.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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