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Band 4.5

The unpaid community service should be made a compulsory part in school curriculums. To what extent do you agree?

#community #service #part #school #curriculums
These days students spend much of their time in school. So, the things that they are taught in schools are very important.
This
 essay
,
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apply
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 will state some valid evidence for the same. To embark, to advance a convincing theory I could deal with, the impact of schools on students. It is crystal clear that
,
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apply
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school
Add an article
the school
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 has
effect
Add an article
an effect
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 on people’s future life and
work
. Teenagers not only learn lessons like physics and math but
also
 find friends. In
this
 way
they
Correct pronoun usage
their
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personality
Fix the agreement mistake
personalities
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 will shape. Teachers and the content of each class have
knock-on
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a knock-on
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 effect on children.
As a result
, unpaid
work
 is really good.
First
 and foremost, they learn not to
work
 only for money.
In addition
 to what I have just said, they understand the value of money.
Furthermore
, they will be a multi-skilled person that can overcome
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 problem by any means. They can
also
 improve their communication and find new friends there. Not
last
 but not least, government don’t need to pay for
this
 stuff and they can spend the money on other services.
for example
, new buses can be bought or brand-new facilities could be constructed. In the forthcoming; paragraph I could deal with its disadvantages.
Although
 there are many benefits related to
this
, it
also
 has ill effects.
Firstly
,
this
 makes them tired and they won’t have enough time to study for school. Another feature which I could mention is, it is not their future job and they won’t understand what they are really interested in. To conclude,
this
 kind of
work
are
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is
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 really helpful.
Submitted by s.pantea.rahnama on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Civic responsibility
  • Interpersonal skills
  • Empathy
  • Real-world experience
  • Theoretical knowledge
  • Practical application
  • Well-rounded character
  • University applications
  • Commitment
  • Potential exploitation
  • Personal growth
  • Public service
  • Volunteerism
  • Community engagement
  • Life skills
  • Teamwork
  • Social responsibility
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