IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

The growth of online shopping will one day lead to all shops in towns and cities closing. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience

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While
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 there is no doubt that we are continuously seeing more and more people using online platforms for shopping, I believe that there is no possibility that it will lead to the closure of physical shops and stores at any time in future. In
this
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 essay, I will briefly explain the reasons why shopping malls, stores, and retail shops will never go out of business. First of all, no matter how efficiently the
product
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 is being shown on a website, one is still unable to physically experience it. Personally, I do believe that
majority
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the majority
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 of people like to touch, feel, and sense the
product
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 before making a purchase.
For example
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, when a person is ordering food online, he would always be confused
that
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about
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 whether it would be
as per
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to
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 his taste or not.
On the contrary
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, if he
was seeing
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sees
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 the same dish in a restaurant, additional senses like smell and taste
will
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would
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 help him in making the decision;
hence
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, he can decide much
easier
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more easily
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.
Furthermore
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, the trust which is built by personally using or testing a
product
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 is on a different level than reading the specifications of an item on a website. To illustrate
this
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, even by reading about all the technical features and technologies used in the
car
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 which people are seeing in a video, they would still like to drive the
car
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 personally.
This
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 is how they will be able to check the smoothness of the drive, the silence of the cabin, and the steering abilities of the
car
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.
Therefore
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, we see that despite having the latest websites, the majority of
car
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 sales still happen in their showrooms. In conclusion, there is no denying that the online shopping model is gaining traction;
however
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, the experience and the chance of physically testing a
product
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 which a physical shop offers has no comparison with what one can read or see on a website. I do believe that physical stores, shopping malls, and retail shops will always be present in our towns and cities as they do not have any substitute.

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Task Response
The essay effectively addresses the prompt and provides a clear position on the topic. The arguments are relevant and well-developed with specific examples to support the response.
Coherence and Cohesion
The essay is well-structured with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The ideas are logically arranged, and there is a clear progression from one point to the next. The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reinforces the position stated in the introduction.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • e-commerce
  • brick-and-mortar
  • physical stores
  • online retailers
  • retail apocalypse
  • digital economy
  • consumer behavior
  • sustainability
  • commercial landscape
  • high-street
  • consumer trends
  • augmented reality
  • showrooms
  • carbon footprint
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