Some people think that spending a lot on holding weddings, birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money. Others, however think that these are necessary for individuals and the society. Discuss both views.

Most often hosting an occasion in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society tends to bring families and loved ones together. A few numbers
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
people
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
of the ideology that most ceremonies
such
as weddings, birthday parties and other
ocassions
Correct your spelling
occasions
that
seems
Correct subject-verb agreement
seem
show examples
fit to be celebrated
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
a waste of resources whereas others
thinks
Change the verb form
think
show examples
otherwise
. In
this
,
essay
Add an article
an essay
the essay
show examples
I will elaborate on both views. Hosting
people
on various
Correct your spelling
occasions
ocassions
Correct your spelling
occasions
is of great value to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society because it gives individuals great opportunities to change
environment
Add an article
the environment
show examples
for
Add the comma(s)
,for
show examples
example , an invite to the United States for a wedding ceremony
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will glamour the invitee having
such
a
priviledge
Correct your spelling
privilege
to explore
into
Change preposition
apply
show examples
another
country
. It powers
one
on
one
communication with families and friends who would
honor
Change the spelling
honour
show examples
the invitation as well.
Furthermore
, it creates revenue for the government
in
Change preposition
by
show examples
raising funds used in the reconstruction and development of the
country
.
Also
, it strengthens the family bond amongst
one
another ,
consequently
,
one
can be able to bring
back
Delete extra word
apply
show examples
new ideas back to their
country
. It enhanced
ones
Change to a genitive case
one's
show examples
knowledge into knowing different cultures and settings of other
community
Fix the agreement mistake
communities
show examples
or
country
Fix the agreement mistake
countries
show examples
.
Also
, It exploits
ones
Change to a genitive case
one's
show examples
knowledge about
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
cuisine and
hence
, brings back memories.
Nothwithstanding
Correct your spelling
Notwithstanding
, funds are been lost and sometimes
unforseen
Correct your spelling
unforeseen
incident
Fix the agreement mistake
incidents
show examples
could occur .
For example
, in a situation
where
Correct your spelling
whereby
show examples
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
invitees are been terrorized on
there
Correct your spelling
their
show examples
way by
criminals
Add a comma
,criminals
show examples
it will
demoralized
Change the verb form
demoralize
show examples
people
's
emotion
Fix the agreement mistake
emotions
show examples
. Again due to the current economy some
people
thinks
Correct subject-verb agreement
think
show examples
that saving
such
amount
Correct article usage
an amount
show examples
of money will affect
one
's financial status. In summary, regardless of the expenses that will surface and the negative beliefs of some
people
Add a comma
,people
show examples
I am of the opinion that coming together and supporting
one
another when necessary is paramount.
Submitted by adaobihedioha12 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Financially burdensome
  • Unnecessary extravagance
  • Significant life events
  • Cultural traditions
  • Strengthen relationships
  • Community bonds
  • Memorable experiences
  • Investment in happiness
  • Lavish parties
  • Moderation
  • Excessive spending
  • Long-term investment
  • Honoring milestones
What to do next:
Look at other essays: