IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some of the methods used in advertising are unethical and unacceptable in today's society. To what extent do you agree with this view?

#methods #society
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In recent times,advertising is becoming increasingly popular.It is believed by some people that the ways of commercials are directed immorally and unsuitable in society.I completely agree with
this
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 view because many
adverts
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 contain inappropriate
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scenes
sciences
scences
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scenes
 and
this
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 could affect the younger generations negatively. Many
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commercials
commericals
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commercials
 display inappropriate pictures.They only focus on the public attraction by applying beautiful models that are dressed in their underwear,not concerning about the
product
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.It is unethical because the
product
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 advertised
do
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does
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 not have any relationship with the models.It does not give extra
information
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 about the
product
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.
For example
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,in a modern car advertisement,two ladies were dressed in their underwear while washing the car.It does not include
about
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apply
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extra details but
to
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apply
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seduce the viewers.Where was the main idea of
this
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product
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?
Adverts
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 like
this
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 should be rejected due to inappropriate content.
Furthermore
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,all
adverts
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 contain
fasle
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false
information
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.They give the viewers unrealistic expectations.Buyers always don't feel the exact results that are advertised.Some advertisements are silly and some are pointless.
For instance
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,many weight loss products advertised
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do
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don
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do
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 not work as expected.
In current
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Current
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 days,the picture of the skinny girl is cut and twisted
instead
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 of true
information
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 in the advertisements.They do
this
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 because they know surely that people are more interested in the outcome and they only inquire
more
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about more
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 details when they have started using the
product
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. In conclusion, some people think that the methods employed in
adverts
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 nowadays are unethical and inappropriate. I believe some contain immoral scenes and give wrong
information
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 about the
product
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.
Submitted by tr.zarwaihnin on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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