Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work, Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #teenagers #work #money #lessons #shouldn #sacrifice #rest #activities

Some cases show some people consider part-time work and earning

money

is an excellent idea for

teenagers

to be learned and become responsible individuals in society meanwhile, some other men and women opine working for the teenager will lose the time of resting and after

school

project.

To begin

with, a part-time

job

is a proper strategy for the person who has major activity and still has time to earn some

money

. Students are great examples of

this

manner especially

teenagers

. Students mostly are spending 6-8 hours in

school

and after that, there is a period of time that they can do some out-

school

activities like a part-time

job

. When

teenagers

earn

money

at a young age, the belief shows how it is hard to earn

money

and never waste it, will be happened in their mind.

In addition

, working as a member of society even working at a part-time

job

mounts responsibility, expertise, and experience in

this

manner.

Furthermore

, the most crucial thing is it might be the light for discovering their own talents.

However

, they should never forget to not take things in their stride which can have serious consequences on their lives. Schools are meant to be the

first

and most suitable places for children to become responsible, literate, and achieve scientific information. After

school

, there is a lot of homework and lessons exit to take care

Change preposition

of.

show examples

Involving in a part-time

job

may postpone after-

school

activities which makes

school

lessons worst. According to recent studies,

teenagers

who were contributing to a part-time

job

illustrated weaker physical and mental conditions than did those without a part-time

job

This

definitely will be harmful to the health and major activities of

teenagers

. Taken together, it is believed juveniles have the opportunity to become responsible and expert people like adult individuals only with involving in a part-time

job

Although

, some consequences are inevitable. I believed

teenagers

with an appropriate long-term plan, can get through

school

, entertainment, rest and work altogether.

Submitted by TUTOO on Sun Jul 31 2022

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for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

329 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people say that teenagers should work part-time and earn money. This way they will learn basic lessons about work and become more disciplined. Others argue that teenagers shouldn't sacrifice their rest and after-school activities to work, Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some people work for the same organization all their working life. Others think that it is better to work for different organizations. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation?

Many manufactured food and drink products contain high levels of sugar; which causes many health problems. Sugary products should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?

In many countries, the number of plants and animals are declining. why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?

many people spend less time with their family. what could be the reasons for this. is this a negetive or possitive trend