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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The users of social media, such as Facebook, Twitter, are replacing face-to-face contact in this century. Do you think the advantages of this way outweigh the disadvantages?

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Because of the growth in social media usage, an increased number of individuals tend to prefer virtual media communication rather than face-to-face meetings. From my point of view, even though there are merits involved in choosing social networking sites for the exchange of information, the demerits are more deadly.
Firstly
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, giving priority to the internet as the medium for communication for meeting new
people
Use synonyms
 and keeping in contact with loved ones helps individuals
to
Verb problem
apply
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save a good deal of money in many ways.
For instance
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, travelling expenses, expenditure on recreational activities, and other sectors which lure money unknowingly can be solved. Even though maintaining a strong network connection is an expensive thing, it is far cheaper than spending when going out.
Moreover
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, they can schedule their day productively by utilising their time on important tasks.
On the other hand
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, there are numerous disadvantages present in terms of depending on the
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
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instead
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 of direct contact for communications.
Initially
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, spending a longer duration in the virtual world by sharing ideas and opinions,
people
Use synonyms
 might find it very complex to socialise in the real world.
For instance
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, after the pandemic lockdown, a sheer number of youngsters who were addicted to Instagram and Facebook showed negligence in meeting
people
Use synonyms
 in real and their cooperative skills decreased dramatically.
In contrast
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, exposure to the internet world has decorated not only the socialising skills but
also
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 the health of youngsters
as well as
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 the elders.
Moreover
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, in terms of meetups,
although
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 the majority of the members participate in unions and meetings, the
data transferring
Add a hyphen
data-transferring
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 skills and talents that could only be acquired from verbal idea exchange are said to be improbable to perform through screens.
To conclude
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,
while
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 adopting the social media lifestyle for the transfer of information
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 few advantages, the detrimental effect it has on
people
Use synonyms
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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 on the higher side, which is an acute problem because it indices impacts on social, future, and behaviour of many individuals.

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task response
In the introduction, make sure to clearly state your opinion on whether you think the advantages of using social media outweigh the disadvantages.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph is logically connected to the next, with clear topic sentences and transitions to improve coherence.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • enhanced connectivity
  • geographical barriers
  • maintaining relationships
  • valuable tool
  • staying informed
  • global issues
  • current events
  • niche topics
  • professional networking
  • career growth
  • business opportunities
  • mental health challenges
  • anxiety
  • depression
  • feelings of loneliness
  • over-reliance
  • face-to-face interactions
  • social skills
  • emotional intelligence
  • privacy concerns
  • data security
  • personal information
  • accessed and misused
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