IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The money spent by hovernments on space programmes would be better spent on vital public services such as schools and hospitals. To what extent do you agree or disagree .

#money #hovernments #space #programmes #services #schools #hospitals
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There's a heated discussion about how the government allocated people's tax money for. And
this
Linking Words
 essay will unravel
this
Linking Words
 issue. Looking at how much we paid for taxes and letting the government allocate our money for our benefits. By all ,means we all have the right to question whether they're spending our money in the right places.
First
Linking Words
, we need to look at what will benefit we as a citizen will get when they're investing in
space
Use synonyms
programmes
Use synonyms
.
Space
Use synonyms
programmes
Use synonyms
 prove that our
country
Use synonyms
 has the professionals, capacities and resources to explore the most difficult adventure in human history.
This
Linking Words
 kind of investment will make our
country
Use synonyms
 to be known as a
country
Use synonyms
 that has all the capabilities to do that. And it will lead to business deals and strengthen our currency.
Secondly
Linking Words
, we
also
Linking Words
 should look at the current condition of our
country
Use synonyms
. Before having a
space
Use synonyms
 programme, our
country
Use synonyms
 should have considered whether our public services are already adequate enough to sustain the
space
Use synonyms
programmes
Use synonyms
 themselves.
For example
Linking Words
, to have
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
a space programme
space programmes
show examples
space
Use synonyms
programmes
Use synonyms
, you need to have a professional
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
run it. So it means that you'll need an adequate school to produce that kind of professional people. The decision that our
country
Use synonyms
 makes should be based on that consideration for
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 long term. Whether we'll have our currency strengthened or have the ability to sustain it. In conclusion, looking at our current situation it's better to strengthen our foundation
first
Linking Words
 rather than skipping and going to the big prize. It means we should focus on how we can produce professionals
first
Linking Words
 rather than having
space
Use synonyms
programmes
Use synonyms
Submitted by nit.not.miaw on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: