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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays, more and more people decide to have children later in their life. What are the reasons? What are the negative impacts on society and family life?

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Some
people
Use synonyms
 argue that the government is waiting for resources in certain aspects
such
Linking Words
 as
arts
Use synonyms
,
paintings
Correct word choice
and paintings
show examples
 and they should spend the funds
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 public services like
education
Use synonyms
, transport and healthcare. From my point of view,
although
Linking Words
arts
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as painting and music
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 vital to relax
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 daily
basic
Replace the word
basis
show examples
, the governments should spend the expense
of for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 public service There is no denying that some entertainment programs
such
Linking Words
 as art,
paintings
Correct word choice
and paintings
show examples
 are important activities that help
people
Use synonyms
 relax in their leisure time.
Firstly
Linking Words
, these activities help
people
Use synonyms
 reduce stress and their
mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
show examples
 after busy working hours.
As a result
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 feel more energetic by participating in these activities.
For example
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,
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
research from Harvard University found that doing two things at the same time like listening to music and studying helps
people
Use synonyms
 improve their mood, motivates learners and improves memory.
In addition
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,
arts
Use synonyms
 are considered a major source of income
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 a nation.
For instance
Linking Words
, in the USA, there are a large number of
Use synonyms
arts
Change the noun form
art
show examples
 museums over the country where millions of visitors come each year to experience different cultures that
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
 the economy earn a huge amount of money.
However
Linking Words
, investing more money in some public services
such
Linking Words
 as
education
Use synonyms
,
transport
Correct word choice
and transport
show examples
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 several advantages not only for individuals but
also
Linking Words
 for society.
To begin
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 with,
education
Use synonyms
 plays an important role in the development of the country.
This
Linking Words
 means that if a nation invests in the development of
education
Use synonyms
, the economy will grow faster than
other
Change preposition
in other
show examples
 countries which bring more opportunity for jobs and better quality of life to
people
Use synonyms
.
Therefore
Linking Words
, in order for society to become more modernized, every nation needs a large number of engineers, doctors, experts and so on.
Therefore
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that is
Linking Words
 the reason why the government should invest more in
education
Use synonyms
.
Besides
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, public transport should be invested to make and meet the demand of humans.
As a result
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 can save on travel expenses, limit the impact of outside weather and enjoy a good time when
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 by bus.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the community will reduce traffic
jam
Fix the agreement mistake
jams
show examples
,
environmental
Correct word choice
and environmental
show examples
 pollution from private cars.
As a result
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 is
reason
Add an article
the reason
a reason
show examples
 why the government should invest in public service to
Use synonyms
Change noun form
people’s
show examples
people’
Correct your spelling
people's
show examples
 life become more
modernization
Replace the word
modernised
show examples
 and convenient. In conclusion, it is clear that spending money
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
 some public services is beneficial both for an individual and
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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