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Writing Samples /
Band 5

The charts below show temperature and rainfall in Equatorial climate and Mediterranean climate. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant

The charts below show temperature and rainfall in Equatorial climate and Mediterranean climate. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant
#show #temperature #rainfall #climate #mediterranean #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The chart provides information about the climatic conditions in
Equatorial
Correct article usage
the Equatorial
show examples
 and Mediterranean regions. It illustrates
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
temperature
 and
also
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the amount of
rainfall
 in those regions.
Overall
, the
rainfall
 and the
temperature
 in the respective regions were represented in cu mm and degree
celcius
Correct your spelling
celsius
 for a period of one
year
.
Firstly
, on one
hand
Add a comma
,hand
show examples
 the
rainfall
 in the Equatorial
climate
 had a rise in the
intial
Correct your spelling
initial
 month of the
year
 later in the
mid
Add a hyphen
mid-months
show examples
months
 it fluctuated between 150-200 cu mm.
At the end
 of the
year
 in the
months
 of November and
December
Add a comma
,December
show examples
rainfall
 had
it’s
Replace the word
its
show examples
 peak.
On the other hand
 in the Mediterranean
climate
 the
rainfall
 had
it’s
Replace the word
its
show examples
 peak in the
intial
Correct your spelling
initial
months
 and
at the end
 of the
year
,
however
 in the mid
months
Add a comma
,months
show examples
 there was a drastic decrease in the
rainfall
.
Secondly
, the
temperature
 in the Equatorial
climate
 remained steady throughout the
year
 which was about
25 degree
Add a hyphen
25-degree
show examples
celcius
Correct your spelling
celsius
,
however
Add a comma
,however
show examples
 the
temperature
 in the Mediterranean
climate
 increased drastically in the
intial
Correct your spelling
initial
months
 and had
it’s
Correct your spelling
its
show examples
peak
Add an article
a peak
the peak
show examples
 in the month of August lather there was a rapid fall in the
temperature
 which
equaled
Change the spelling
equalled
show examples
 to the
intial
Correct your spelling
initial
months
.
Submitted by varsh201 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end, however".
▼
Contractions: Don't use contractions.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words temperature, rainfall, year, climate, months with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 4 times.
▼

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