Some people prefer to help or support directly in the local community for people who need it; however, others prefer to give money to the national or internet charities. Discuss both views and give your own opinions.

Many
people
these days have differing ideas as regards
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
how to aid each other in
difficult
Add an article
a difficult
show examples
situation: one side says that straightly applying(ed) help
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
better to individuals who want
being
Change the verb form
to be
show examples
assist
Wrong verb form
assisted
show examples
(ed), whereas the others support the idea
providing
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of providing
show examples
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
money
to the
variety
Replace the word
various
show examples
range of
charities
.
However
, from my point of view, ensuring
people
with direct support would be more efficient. Those who advocate delivering
money
to
people
believe that
this
method is productive for supplying financial
remedy
Fix the agreement mistake
remedies
show examples
to a wide range of society. According to a number of
people
, financial assistance might be easier
obtaining
Change the verb form
to obtain
show examples
for individuals. If we consider that, there are more and more
people
at
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in
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
remote areas who need support,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
contacting
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contact
show examples
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them can
harder
Add a missing verb
be harder
show examples
than thought, because of
distance
Add an article
the distance
show examples
between both sides. Another aspect of
this
opinion is gathering a high amount of
money
that can only be ensured by
charities
. There are educational, health,
human
Correct word choice
and human
show examples
services
charities
which are needed to construct buildings,
providing
Correct word choice
and providing
show examples
equipment and employees.
Nevertheless
, I believe that supporting
people
should have done definitely.
Although
some supporters think that assisting the person in society
a
Add a missing verb
is a
show examples
bit embarrassing and
show-off
Correct article usage
a show-off
show examples
,
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the main reason is that the
people
might need to help at that moment whether it is for indicating to other
people
or not.
For instance
, health issues
what
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
must be done
first
aid until medical services come.
Besides
this
approach, one
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
additional positive effect of supporting individuals is
influence
Wrong verb form
influencing
show examples
other
people
while showing appropriate behaviour.
However
, a certain amount of
people
avoiding to help others because of judging.
As a result
acting more helpful
encouraging
Wrong verb form
encourages
show examples
society
being
Change the verb form
to be
show examples
kindness
Replace the word
kind
show examples
and
supporting
Replace the word
supportive
show examples
without taking into consideration any kind of external thoughts. In conclusion, while supplying
money
to
charities
can influence more
people
, I believe that helping directly in communities
more
Add a missing verb
is more
show examples
pivotal for human life.
Submitted by ritm.scastya12 on

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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