IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

As well as making money, businesses also have social responsibilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#money #businesses #responsibilities
It is true that
businesses
 need to make a
profit
 in order to not declare bankruptcy. Some people have opinions about whether
businesses
 should have public
responsibilities
. From my perspective, I totally agree with the statement.
To begin
 with, it seems logical that
businesses
 must make a
profit
 in order to cover their overhead cost. Without profiting from their business,
companies
 might not be able to cover their running costs,
such
 as employees’ salaries, facilities, and payments for the building.
As a result
,
companies
 might declare bankruptcy, and end up closing down their
businesses
. Another argument is that without making profits,
businesses
 might not be able to
fulfil
 their social
responsibilities
.
This
 is because when
businesses
 can not cover their running cost or
fulfil
 customers’ demands, any social concerns might be neglected.
In other words
, less attention might be paid to public concern, simply because
this
 is not
businesses
’ main purpose.
This
 means if a business is not in good financial health, it might not be able to
fulfil
 public concerns.
On the other hand
,
businesses
 should
also
fulfil
 their public
responsibilities
,
instead
 of focusing on the sole purpose of maximising their profits.
Firstly
, one social concern
that is
 associated with managers and
businesses
 is to treat their employees well. Treating employees right might provide them with the comfortability needed to improve their work efficiency, boosting the country’s economy.
Lastly
, I believe that
companies
 should stop abusing accounting loopholes to minimise their
taxes
. Paying
taxes
 is an essential part of
businesses
’ social responsibility.
Instead
 of using accounting loopholes to avoid
taxes
,
companies
 should happily pay
taxes
 to contribute to society. In conclusion, it is logical that
companies
 must make a
profit
 to not go bankrupt,
however
, they should still
fulfil
 public
responsibilities
instead
 of focusing on maximising
profit
.
Submitted by ngoclamthieunang on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Social responsibilities
  • Corporate social responsibility
  • Ethical behavior
  • Societal impact
  • Stakeholders
  • Profit-driven
  • Public perception
  • Environmental sustainability
  • Community development
  • Human rights
  • Workplace safety
  • Altruism
  • Balanced approach
  • Accountability
  • Consumer loyalty
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