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Writing Samples
Band 5

With advances in technological communication, more and more people are able to work from home. This increase of homeworking had been of real benefit to workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

#advances #communication #people #work #home #benefit #workers
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With the improvements
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 online communication platforms, more and more people can make a choice to
work
 from
home
. While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 I agree that working from
home
 can provide many advantages to workers. But, there are a lot of weaknesses
by
Change preposition
to
show examples
 working from
home
 In my opinion, many people do achieve
work
 tests without attending their office through technological communications. They may have flexibility between personal
life
 and professional
life
 because they have not been restricted by their working hours and they have no longer prepared time to go
work
Change preposition
to work
show examples
. If a person enjoys learning new skills, he or she can learn new things
instead
 of spending time going back and forth to the office.
As a result
, he or she can improve
self satisfaction
Add a hyphen
self-satisfaction
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 due to the personal development which can support his or her professional career as well as
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can study continuously without missing
work
.
On the other hand
, they can not get enough of a social workplace in their
home
 rather than office
life
. They are able to
work
 alone without co-workers.
For instance
, they can do ideas sharing and make conversation during break time as a way to relax in the workplace. The workplace atmosphere and relationship are immensely important to improve
work
 efficiency and efficientiveness in an organisation. When they
work
 alone, they will not be able to have discussions with colleagues.
Consequently
, they become depressed and experience an increasing sense of isolation. In conclusion, while online communication impacts on
flexibility
Add an article
the flexibility
show examples
 of private
life
 and professions, I
also
 agree that
work
 isolation will be
some
Correct determiner usage
a
show examples
threats
Fix the agreement mistake
threat
show examples
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 people.
Submitted by tr.zarwaihnin on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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