Some people think women should be allowed to join the army, the navy and the air force just like men. To what extent do you agree ordisagree?
In
this
contemporary epoch, whilst proponents hold a view of women
should participate in the army , opponents hold a diverse view.I am a staunch believer that women
should not be allowed to join the country's army .In this
essay, my point of view will be illustrated.
On one hand , Mothers
are considered the building block of any society.In other words
, they have a salient role in nurturing their offspring. A prominent example was how the german mothers
helped in rebuilding their country by helping their children to learn and acquire new information after they had been defeated in World War Two. this
leads to the paramount raise of the country in the recent decade.To conclude, mothers
play a crucial role in raising their children.
Add the comma(s)
,mothers
On the other hand
, it is believed that they have an eminent part in their families.To clarify , women
always help their husbands to make ends meet by doing some hand jobs , for example
, sewing which helps in improving the family's well-fare.A recent paper , which has been published by socialists in Egypt, found that two-thirds of Egyptian women
help their families with their earnings.To summarize , women
's role cannot be denied.
In conclusion , it has commonly been assumed that women
have a crucial part in their society , as they help in building it up by raising well-developed children. Additionally
, they help in increasing the economical status of their family. In my opinion , it will not be a wise choice to let mothers
join the army owing to their roles.Submitted by ahmadhassan1694 on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite