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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

In some countries, children have short school day of 5 hours. In other countries, the school duration is often longer. Does it have more benefits than drawbacks?

#countries #children #school #hours #duration
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The educational system differs in various countries basically with the
time
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 factor. People say that some regions in the world have
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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less
Change the quantifier
fewer
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hours
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 studying in
school
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 whilst others have lengthy
hours
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.
This
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 essay will discuss the positive and negative and,
then
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 opinions will be drawn. Learning is pivotal but the duration of
study
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 should be taken into consideration. Naturally,
children
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's brains are quick in assimilating ideas and information but ,
then
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 they have
a different levels
Correct the article-noun agreement
different levels
a different level
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 of IQ . Longer
time
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 in the
study
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 makes one
to
Change the verb form
apply
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feel exhausted , and have lesser
time
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 to
study
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 while at home or carry out their assignments. A researcher once opts out that having a nap after
school
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 activities makes the brain of a child more active in articulating. Moreso, different countries have their curriculum of
study
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. For ,example a child who stays in
school
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 learning for more than 6
hours
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 will not be active in carrying out his /her assignment and
study
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 ahead of the teacher,
hence
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 more
time
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 doesn't mean more learning.
Furthermore
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, long
hours
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 spent in
school
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 will discourage most
children
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 from studying in
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
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different divisions,
for example
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 ,
children
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 are encouraged to practice other skills
such
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 as football, and other healthy games that can keep their brains active.
On the other hand
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, longer
time
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 studying will give the teachers more
time
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 to spend with students, to focus on trouble areas and more difficult materials. In conclusion, regardless of various benefits on both sides, I believe that minimum duration in studying is of higher benefits
,
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apply
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 because lengthy
hours
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decreases
Correct subject-verb agreement
decrease
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children
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's ability to concentrate and may not be able to learn anything,after a certain point.
Submitted by adaobihedioha12 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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