The tendency of human beings to copy one another is shown in the popularity of areas such as fashion and consumer goods. To what extent do you agree?

#tendency #beings #copy #popularity #areas #fashion #consumer #goods

A plethora of

evidences

Change the wording

evidence

pieces of evidence

shreds of evidence

show examples

Correct your spelling

demonstrate

demonstrated

deonstrate

Correct your spelling

demonstrates

that human beings have always been mitigating each other in various streams of their lives. A school of thought declares that

this

trens

Correct your spelling

trend

is more obvious in areas

such

as fashion and

commodaties

Correct your spelling

commodities

that

people

purchase. I totally agree with

this

notion.

To begin

with, throughout

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

history, predefined standards have always been influencing

people

's decisions, from what they wear to how they look.

people

have always been trying to keep up with these standards to be fitted

Change preposition

into

show examples

society

. To

Correct your spelling

exemplify

examplify

Correct your spelling

exemplify

, these days wearing

make-ups

Fix the agreement mistake

make-up

show examples

have become rife among women. If a girl does not put on make-up, she will be considered sick or depressed due to her pale face.

Thus

such

standards have led to a

society

where individuals are under the pressure of mimicking each other inevitably, pining their

hops

Correct your spelling

hopes

show examples

to be accepted by their community and not left out.

In addition

, human beings usually choose celebrities as role models in their lives and follow their rules blindly. Even though

such

successful

people

have achieved accomplishments in their careers. ordinary

people

get inspired from whatever they do, in all aspects of life, pining their hopes to

be flourish

Change the verb form

flourish

show examples

just as they did. Advertisements on media showcase

this

trend. As an example, business owners invite

clebrities

Correct your spelling

celebrities

to publicize their

commodaties

Correct your spelling

commodities

. The motivation behind

this

is that business

Correct your spelling

owners

owenrs

Correct your spelling

owners

are aware

about

Change the preposition

show examples

Correct your spelling

celebrities

celebritie's

Change noun form

celebrities'

show examples

impacts on ordinary

people

's decisions.

Thus

, following certain

people

contributes to a

society

mimicking each other. To sum up,

People

copy each other not only to get accepted and not

humiliated

Add a missing verb

be humiliated

show examples

society

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

but

also

to become successful in life, just as their role models did.

Submitted by taravatpart1998 on Thu Aug 11 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

275 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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The tendency of human beings to copy one another is shown in the popularity of areas such as fashion and consumer goods. To what extent do you agree?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Government investment in the arts, such as music and theater, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

Societies produce more and more waste as they become more developed. Why is this the case? What can be done about this problem?

"Some people think that the government should provide free education at every level. Others believe that it is the responsibility of individuals to pay for their education. Discuss both views and give your own opinion."

Many people believe that individuals over 65 should not be allowed to continue working. Other think people should be allowed to work for as long as they choose. Discuss both views and give your opinion.