Bullying is a big problem in many schools. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?

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Offend
Wrong verb form
Offending
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and
bully
Wrong verb form
bullying
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can cause bad mental health to people.
Furthermore
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, there is no doubt that bullying is the main
problem
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in many schools around the globe. Now I am going to give some reasons why
this
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happens
,
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apply
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and represent how
this
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problem
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can be solved.
Firstly
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children
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avoid something that they do not like or do not know about. Bully usually happens because someone
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
both bad health and bad mental health.
For
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example
Add a comma
,example
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in
second
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grade I had a classmate who was obese. No one wanted to talk
him
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to him
show examples
and be friends with him.
This
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case encouraged him to abandon our class and go to another school.
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Moreover
Add a comma
,Moreover
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kids
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can offend someone who
do
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does
show examples
not look similar to them. Recently I have heard about some racist cases when students bullied
another students
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another student
other students
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because they were from another country or culture.
Secondly
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bully
Wrong verb form
bullying
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is usually
happening
Wrong verb form
happens
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because
children
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do not get enough attention. They want to spend more time with
their
Replace the word
there
show examples
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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parents and
trying
Wrong verb form
try
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to get attention
with
Change preposition
in
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such
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bad
Correct article usage
a bad
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way.
Bully
Add an article
The bully
A bully
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may happen because of
bad
Correct article usage
a bad
show examples
upbringing as well. Some parents did not spend enough time with
their
Replace the word
there
show examples
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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kids
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, and do not teach them how to act around
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people.
Eventually
Add a comma
,Eventually
show examples
this
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can cause
such
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problems.
Kids
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simply do not understand that they can not offend
another
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another child
other children
show examples
children
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. To conclude I believe that society can solve
this
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though
problem
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by teaching
children
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what is bad and what is good. Parents
also
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should spend more time with their
kids
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so they do not feel
loneliness
Replace the word
lonely
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. I suppose that
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this
Correct determiner usage
these
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two solutions can partly solve
this
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problem
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by Mezun 2023 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Bullying
  • Harassment
  • Intimidation
  • Diversity
  • Adolescent
  • Mimic
  • Aggressive behavior
  • Cyberbullying
  • Peer pressure
  • Social acceptance
  • Awareness
  • Conflict resolution
  • Peer mediation
  • Consequences
  • Respect
  • Kindness
  • Open communication
  • Vulnerable
  • Buddy system
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