People spend large amounts of time and money on clothes, hairstyles and make up to change their appearance. Is it important for people to be concerned about the way they look? What are the consequences of focussing on physical appearance? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

It is true,that a large number of
people
spend their time and money on their physical appearance.It is important as well as there are some consequences related to it
also
. To commence with,in the time of globalisation and modernization it is vital to focus on physical appearance.To elaborate ,most
people
worked in the private sector and they mainly concentrate on their employees and how they look.
Moreover
,various products are available at a reasonable price.So, the masses afford them easily.
For instance
,in a
survey
Add a comma
,survey
show examples
it has been seen that
people
69% of their income on their looks.
Hence
,
large
Add an article
a large
the large
show examples
amount of money
is spend
Change the verb form
is spent
show examples
on these articles.
On the other hand
,spending
large
Change the article
a large
show examples
amount of money
also
leaves some consequences.To explain,somehow it motivates corruption as
people
want to buy products.
Moreover
,it increases crime and
jeaulosly
Correct your spelling
jealously
jealousy
factors.Even more,
huge
Correct article usage
a huge
show examples
of income they earn
spend
Add the particle
to spend
show examples
on buying these articles.
For example
,in a
report
Add a comma
,report
show examples
it has been seen that most of the crime is related
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
these.
As a result
,
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Aesthetic appeal
  • Body image
  • Consumer culture
  • Grooming habits
  • Personal identity
  • Professional demeanor
  • Psychological well-being
  • Self-esteem
  • Social comparison
  • Societal standards
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