Nowadays, many families have both parents working. Some working parents believe other family members like grandparents can care of their children, while others think childcare centres provide the best care. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#families #parents #members #grandparents #care #children #childcare #centres

Currently, families

both

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in both

show examples

Change preposition

apply

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parents

work are increasing in number. For

this

reason, it is important to consider who can take care of

children

. People have two different

opinion

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opinions

show examples

for

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show examples

this

matter.

However

, some people think that

grandparents

play important role in

children

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children's

show examples

upbringing, while others think that nursery school is the best choice. I

am partially agree

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partially agree

show examples

with

second

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the second

show examples

statement. On the one hand, it is argued that due to

both

parent

Fix the agreement mistake

parents

show examples

work, so as not to remain uncontrolled,

children

are taken care of by other family members,

such

grandparents

. Actually,

this

both

thrifty and safer because

parents

rely on family members.

Consequently

this

creates comfortable feelings

Change preposition

for

show examples

parents

Secondly

, it is irrefutable that being taken care of by

grandparents

enables

children

to learn their family

tradition

Fix the agreement mistake

traditions

show examples

nearer

On the other hand

, I firmly believe that

grandparents

don't have adequate experience to look after

children

, even some of them are physically feeble and inactive,

hence

parents

have sufficient reasons to put their

children

childcare

Add an article

a childcare

the childcare

show examples

centre. Actually, one of the main advantages of nursery

school

Fix the agreement mistake

schools

show examples

is that they have trained staff who have enough practical ability to grow a child.

Furthermore

childcare

Correct article usage

the childcare

show examples

centre offers entertainment which comes interesting to

children

Moreover

, nursery schools

gives

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give

show examples

an opportunity to interact and play with others which will help them to enhance their communication skills. To conclude,

both

of them are up to the

parents

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parent's

parents'

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and

family

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family's

show examples

financial

condition

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conditions

show examples

Although

how much

grandparents

are safer for

children

, childcare centres have professional employees and be looked after by experts will be beneficial for them to adapt

Change preposition

show examples

society easily in the future.

Submitted by malikli.malik1995 on Tue Aug 16 2022

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

270 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays, many families have both parents working. Some working parents believe other family members like grandparents can care of their children, while others think childcare centres provide the best care. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Money spent on space exploration is a complete waste. Governments could better spend this money on other things to benefit the nation. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience

The best way to teach children to cooperate is through team sports at school. To what extent do you agree or disagree? You should write at least 250 words.

Some people believe that it is good for a country 's culture to import foreign movies and TV programmes. Others think that it is better to produce these locally. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.