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Writing Samples
Band 5

young people know about international pop and movie stars but know less about famous historical people. what are the reasons of this trend and what can be done to solve this problem?

#people #pop #movie #stars #trend
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Young
people
Use synonyms
 today are more aware of the latest fashion and often see movie and pop stars as their role models. Adulation of
the
Correct article usage
apply
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social media influencers is
also
Linking Words
 common these days as smartphones and
internet
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the internet
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 are easily accessible to
the
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apply
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teenagers. In
this
Linking Words
 race of being more fashionable, children seem to care a lot less about the historical personalities and the sacrifices they made.
Firstly
Linking Words
,
the
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life in the twentieth century is way more comfortable than it used to be before, so retrospecting on the challenges faced and overcome by our ancestors is not something of a leisure activity for
the
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teens.
Instead
Linking Words
, they look forward to the future and try to be up-to-date with the latest
Correct your spelling
phenomena
phenomina
Correct your spelling
phenomena
.
Secondly
Linking Words
, most of the young folks do not
seem
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toseem
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 have the right knowledge of history as it is deemed as one of the most uninteresting subjects at school. If the students are not able to relate
with
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to
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 the events of a certain era,
then
Linking Words
 they are unlikely to find the ideals from that time.
Finally
Linking Words
, a fair share of credit
also
Linking Words
 goes to movies, songs, and advertisements, which tend to present
the
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celebrities as the epitome of style.
For instance
Linking Words
, it is very common for
the
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teenagers to copy the hairstyle worn by a
popstar
Correct your spelling
pop star
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 in a certain music video. Peer pressure and the fear of
laggining
Correct your spelling
lagging
 behind make them more curious to learn about the stars of current times.
Although
Linking Words
, there is nothing wrong
in
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with
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 following your favourite hip-hop stars and influencers on social media,
but
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it is
also
Linking Words
 important to have some information about the historical figures. Government can play an important role here to encourage
people
Use synonyms
 to celebrate the historical events, which will make their children more aware
about
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of
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 the
people
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 involved in them. Another way can be to encourage the young folks to read the biographies of
the
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important
people
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 where they can learn about the influence they had on
the
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society.
Submitted by cooljumpin on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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