Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view.

Most individuals believe that wasting the budget on the forte is not a correct approach and that the government ought to consume it for more valuable achievements.
in
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In
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my point of view, it would damage the structure of society. Basically, humans have been interested in crafts for years. At
first,
when humans had been living in caves, the accomplishments were a way to connect with each other. In fact, they were likely to know anything about
arts
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art
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but they created wonderful works of art.
Otherwise
, they had never been looking for fame and they just had a social action.
For instance
, having painted a cow on the wall of a cave, they would particularly teach their children how they would know that.
Secondly
, the arts are nowadays the way in which people show their
feeling
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feelings
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and
thought
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thoughts
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. Remarkably, as in the past, Artists will be explaining their beliefs for the future with their accomplishments and talents.
Therefore
, art would be a valuable heritage and without ,it we would never have found how our ancestors have been living.
For example
, a film or writing even a painting might help us how their creators think.
Furthermore
, in some ,committees the social information is given by artists’ accomplishments. In conclusion, it seems spending money on artwork not only would help the governments and societies to develop but
also
help the future to recognize how they think.
Thus
, in my opinion, spending money on the arts would be fruitful for all people. So, consuming budget for it
cause
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causes
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expand
Wrong verb form
expanded
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knowledge of folk and it will inversely help the society to identify themselves by the art.
However
, it is not the only way to realize
this
but it is one of the best ways.
Submitted by ahad.dana on

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Task Response
Your essay addresses the topic, but your response is not fully developed and lacks clarity. You should provide a more comprehensive and focused argument, with clear examples and explanations.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your essay has an adequate structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, there is room for improvement in forming clear connections between ideas and presenting a more cohesive argument.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • enriching society
  • promoting cultural understanding
  • development of talent
  • creative industries
  • economic benefits
  • generate revenue
  • cultural heritage
  • identity
  • prioritize spending
  • needs of the majority
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