Some people argue that it is more important to have an enjoyable job than to earn a lot of money. Others disagree and think that a good salary leads to a better life.

#people #job #money #salary #life

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It is currently debatable whether a well-paid

job

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job

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satisfaction can bring true

happiness

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people

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. From my point of view, since humans are made of emotions, they should go after

jobs

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that are satisfying and, in

this

Linking Words

essay, the merits of both views will be explored while putting forward my ideas. On the one hand, it is wise to consider that if we lack enthusiasm or interest in our work, our mental health would be broken down.

For instance

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, if one cannot find

happiness

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at his work, he may think life is tedious and stressful.

Consequently

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, it will

also

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affect the members of his social circle, including his family, friends and relatives. In the worst case, he could lose the sense of his existence and suffer from serious mental health hazards.

Secondly

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, only

happiness

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can bring success.

In other words

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people

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should have passion for their

jobs

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this

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is the key to success.

For example

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, there are no successful

people

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who do not love what they are doing.

On the other hand

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, nowadays, since almost everything can be bought with money, it is

also

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acceptable to choose a

job

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which grants us a good income.

This

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means that, as today’s era is creating a more competitive ambience, without a well-paid

job

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, a luxurious life is a dream that cannot be achieved.

Therefore

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, it is understandable why some

people

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choose high-paid

jobs

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over their own

happiness

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. Seemingly, another factor is that fame can sometimes be bought with money.

For instance

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, if one has a good income, he will certainly become rich sooner or later.

Subsequently

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, he will be famous automatically due to the large sum of money he owns.

Thus

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, having a high-paid

job

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can sometimes be desirable. In conclusion, in spite of the virtues of having an enticing salary, I personally believe that

job

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satisfaction should be the

first

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priority as it can bring not only genuine

happiness

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but

also

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success to us.

Hence

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people

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should be proud of themselves for taking the

jobs

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that they have a passion for.

Submitted by tr.zarwaihnin on Sat Aug 27 2022

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

343 words

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Some people argue that it is more important to have an enjoyable job than to earn a lot of money. Others disagree and think that a good salary leads to a better life.

Your opinion

Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, one of the widely discussed problems are about traffic jams. What we should to minimise this problem? This essay will discuss about it.