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Writing Samples
Band 4

some people believe that children should learn how to cook and prepare food in their lessons. what is your opinion about that.

#people #children #cook #food #lessons
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In
this
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 era,there are many
people
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think
Correct pronoun usage
who think
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 that young boys and girls should be
Correct your spelling
taught
tought
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taught
 in school about cooking and making
food
Use synonyms
 in their classes.In my
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opinion
Correct your spelling
opinion
oponion
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,oponion
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
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 think it is
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a great
great
agreat
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a great
 idea
firstly
Linking Words
,teaching
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children
childern
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children
 cooking and preparing
food
Use synonyms
 is a good way to make them able to depend on themselves,
also
Linking Words
 it enables them to help their mothers who are working all
the
Correct article usage
apply
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day doing
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housework
houseworks
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housework
. when
i
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I
show examples
 was a child my teacher always gave me a lesson per week regarding kitchen and how to make simple meals and
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 was very happy attending that lesson,so
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 spend hours practising at home and it was a great experience.when
Correct your spelling
children
childern
Correct your spelling
children
 learn how to cook they become more helpful,social and
self confident
Add a hyphen
self-confident
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.It
also
Linking Words
 helps them to have a healthier life and decrease the rate of diseases resulting from
food
Use synonyms
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poisoning
poisining
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poisoning
.
on the other hand
Linking Words
,some
people
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 think that there is no need of teaching
youngs
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young
show examples
 cooking in their school as in modern life it is not a great issue as it can be easily learned and depends on the kid's interest.
people
Use synonyms
Correct your spelling
also
aslo
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also
 believe that lessons should be given to girls only as boys will not benefit from it.
therefore
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 they are
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
many other
import
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important
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 things that young
people
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 can learn
such
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 as :how to use
internet
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the internet
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 and how to discover and
develope
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develop
childern's
Correct your spelling
children's
 interests In conclusion,many
people
Use synonyms
 think that young boys and girls should be
Correct your spelling
taught
tought
Correct your spelling
taught
 in school about cooking and making
food
Use synonyms
 while other think there is no need
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 it.it depends mainly on the kids if they are interested or not.
Submitted by mustafa_dervis on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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