Some people believe that women should play an equal role as men in a country's military force, while others think women are not suitable for these kinds of jobs. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #women #role #men #country #force #kinds #jobs

It is argued that

women

should take an equal part as their male counterparts in the national military force, while the opponent

consider

Change the verb form

considers

show examples

that

women

are not qualified for these careers. I will discuss

about

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apply

show examples

both views in

this

essay. On the one hand, some maintain that

female

Fix the agreement mistake

females

show examples

are weaker in physical strength so

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

they should be inferior to

male

Fix the agreement mistake

males

show examples

in the military. Indeed,

women

Correct your spelling

soldiers

soilders

Correct your spelling

soldiers

are not as strong as

male

Fix the agreement mistake

males

show examples

and are less tolerant

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show examples

extreme conditions.

However

, with the advancement in technology, humans are increasingly replaced by robots and

mechanic

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mechanical

show examples

equipments

Change the wording

equipment

types of equipment

pieces of equipment

show examples

in modern wars.

For example

, unmanned

aircrafts

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aircraft

show examples

can be used to complete different missions

instead

of sending

Correct your spelling

soldiers

soliders

Correct your spelling

soldiers

into precarious war zones.

Therefore

women

can

also

be assigned the same tasks as men in the army.

Furthermore

, a majority of

women

have become successful pilots through diligent training as they have the same talent as men do.

On the other hand

, others suggest that

women

cannot choose a career like

policewoman

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a policewoman

show examples

, firewomen or

first-responders

Correct your spelling

first responders

show examples

, for

women

are not competent for these jobs. It is considered that men should contribute to

serve

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serving

show examples

the country

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

and work in conditions with unpredictable dangers.

Nevertheless

, many

women

also

dream about joining the military or becoming firefighters. Females are more caring and thoughtful, for which they might

also

excel in solving crimes and interrogating criminals.

For instance

American

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the American

show examples

TV series Unbelievable was adapted from a true story focusing on two

wemen

Correct your spelling

women

detectives,

Change preposition

apply

show examples

which

Correct pronoun usage

who

show examples

they

Correct pronoun usage

who

show examples

successfully discovered the truth in a rape case and caught the offenders, while their male colleagues ignored important evidence and failed to do so. In conclusion, I believe that

women

should be treated equally in the task forces, including

military

Correct article usage

the military

show examples

, police and fire department, for they are as competent as their male counterparts.

Submitted by 1123747551 on Sun Aug 28 2022

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

299 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that women should play an equal role as men in a country's military force, while others think women are not suitable for these kinds of jobs. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In most countries fast food is becoming cheaper and more available Do you think the advantage of this development outweigh the disadvantage?

Some people find it difficult to manage their money. How could the goverment help prevent debt problems and support such people?

Computers are becoming an essential part of school lessons. Do the advantages of using computers for learning outweigh its disadvantages?

Many people argue that restaurants should be required to disclose the nuritional information of the dishes they serve. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?