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Writing Samples
Band 5

In some countries, there has been an increase in the number of advertisements that try to persuade children to buy snacks, toys, and other goods. Some people claim this is unfair as parents feel under pressure to buy these kinds of things for their children. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#countries #advertisements #children #snacks #toys #goods #people #parents #pressure #kinds
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In today’s modern era, advertisements
of
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for
show examples
 snacks and toys have become even more aggressive and annoying. They mainly aim
on
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at
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children
 who begin begging their parents to pay for these goods. Some people assume that
such
situation
Correct article usage
a situation
show examples
as
Correct your spelling
is
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 unjust.
However
, I fully disagree with
this
 viewpoint and I would explain my opinion broader in
this
 essay.
Firstly
, restricting
advertising
Correct article usage
the advertising
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 of snacks and toys would significantly decrease their annual revenue, because people mainly find out about new collections from
marketing
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the marketing
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of
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apply
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these goods. It is not fair at all to reduce
financial
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the financial
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 accounts of companies from these areas because someone does not want to be under pressure. If
advertisement
Add an article
an advertisement
the advertisement
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 is considered
as
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apply
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a phenomenon, it becomes clear that any ad creates
special
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a special
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 type of pressure on the listener.
Secondly
, it is only
parents’
Correct article usage
the parents’
show examples
 responsibility to look after the
children
, and especially control the content that they receive day to day.
Consequently
, if you are against the ads
of
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for
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 different toys or snacks, do not let
children
 observe them.
Moreover
, it is hard to state where the child has seen that toy or snack. It could possibly be a shop or his friend telling him about them. To conclude, parents need to get used to the fact that
children
 and their behaviour are only their
zone
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zones
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 of responsibility, so neither the companies nor the government should care about the ads that they see.
Nevertheless
, it would be respectful
from
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of
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 the companies to make their marketing less annoying
for
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to
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 the public.
Submitted by vlad233322 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Pervasive
  • Exploit
  • Impressionable
  • Consumerist attitude
  • Materialistic values
  • Unrealistic expectations
  • Financial strain
  • Culture of indulgence
  • Mitigating
  • Stricter controls
  • Proactive role
  • Educating about consumerism
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