Nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play computer games. What are the problems of playing computer games and what can you suggest to minimize the bad effects?

#people #access #computers #basis #children #computer #games #effects

In the modern era,

computers

are played an important role in everyone's life. In

this

context, many individuals have used computer units on a large range and a number of adolescents

playing

Wrong verb form

play

show examples

computer

games

This

essay

will discuss the main

problems

of playing

games

including health issues and poor academic performance.

This

essay

will

also

suggest solutions to these

problems

including monitoring

children

and encouraging them to read books.

To begin

with,

children

are facing health-related issues that

also

affect their education

for

Change preposition

apply

show examples

those who have access to

computers

For instance

, eyesight is affected by playing

games

computers

because

children

have a lot of free

time

to play

games

Moreover

student's

Fix the agreement mistake

students'

show examples

education

are

Change the verb form

show examples

also

affected because they focus on studying less as compared to spending

time

on PC.

As a result

, they get poor grades in their final exams. So, health

problems

and the education of pupils are affected by

computers

. Monitoring

children

's activities and encouraging them to read books are both critical to reducing playing

games

. There are a lot of

children

which spend

time

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

useless activities.

Furthermore

, it is

also

the duty of parents to check their pupils and reduce the number of hours to watch gaming devices.

Therefore

, they have no

time

to waste on useless activities. In conclusion,

computers

also

bad effect on people's life.

This

essay

discussed two main causes of spending more

time

on laptops.

This

essay

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

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When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

252 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Nowadays many people have access to computers on a wide basis and a large number of children play computer games. What are the problems of playing computer games and what can you suggest to minimize the bad effects?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

plastic shopping bags contribute to the pollution of air and sea. Some people think they should be banned. Do you agree or disagree ?

Few people say that at all levels of education from primary school to university, too much time is spent on learning facts and no enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree?

Parents should encourage children to spend less time studying and more time doing physical activities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many feel that going to the gym is the best way to stay fit. Other think there are more effective methods. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.