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Band 6

It is believed that women are more suited to child-rearing than men. What is your opinion on this issue?

#women #men
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Parents always provide
best
Correct article usage
the best
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 for their offspring. They are
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a mentor
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mentor
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mentors
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 for their kids. Many people think that
women
Use synonyms
 can take
care
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 of their little
one
Correct pronoun usage
ones
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 better than
men
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. In my opinion, mothers are more caring as compared to fathers.
To begin
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 with, children are forever attached more
with
Change preposition
to
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 mothers.
Moreover
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, it is natural that
women
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 give full
efforts
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effort
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 to save their adolescents from any harm.
For example
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, mothers don’t buy anything for themselves and their
first
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 preference
to
Add a missing verb
is to
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fulfill
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fulfil
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 the need of their children. In
olden
Correct article usage
the olden
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 days, ladies were staying at home and
only
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the only
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 work is to do household chores and manage their
families
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.
However
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, trends
has
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have
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 been changed
from
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in
show examples
Linking Words
last
Correct article usage
the last
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 40 years, both parents are working but
still
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,still
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 it is seen that females are more attached
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
 their
infant
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infants
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 and give time to them.
In addition
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 to
this
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, they keep on helping in studying
also
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.
On the other hand
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, it has been seen fathers are
also
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 worried about the future of their juveniles. They are breadwinners for their
families
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.
For instance
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,
families
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Correct your spelling
set up
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setup
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set up
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 a business for
future
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the future
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generation
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generations
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 so that they will not suffer from any tough circumstances and earn easily.
Furthermore
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,
men
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 do hard work
through
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throughout
show examples
 life only to give more facilities to their
families
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.
Hence
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,
men
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 cannot
care
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
apply
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the way
as
Correct word choice
apply
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women
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 do for
family
Correct article usage
the family
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. To conclude, it is important to have both parents in life.
Therefore
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, they equally
care
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 as
mother
Correct article usage
the mother
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 showers love,
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care
Correct word choice
and care
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of
Change preposition
for
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 their child and
father
Correct article usage
the father
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 is earing to accomplish the need of their kids.
Women
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 are better
multitasked
Change preposition
at multitasked
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Linking Words
then
Correct your spelling
than
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men
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by jasmeetkaur2016 on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • child-rearing
  • caregiver
  • social constructs
  • nurturing
  • gender roles
  • stereotypes
  • paternity leave
  • co-parenting
  • development
  • economic pressures
  • primary caregiver
  • gender biases
  • fluidity of roles
  • societal norms
  • inherent differences
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