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Some people think that parents should teach children how to be good members of society. Others however, believe that school is the place to learn this.

#people #parents #children #members #society #school #place
Some people think
parents
 should teach
children
 how to be good members of society
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
 think
school
 is the place to learn, in
this
 essay I will give my own opinion. In my view from birth to
age
Correct article usage
the age
show examples
 of 7 , that age
children
 go to
school
parents
 should teach them how they behave or what should they do, because
parents
 are the first people that
children
 meet and grow up with them, family and home
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 the first place that
children
 are a member of, so they learn in the family how they communication, how ask for something that they want and how most they face a problem. After the age of 7 when
children
 go to
school
Add a comma
school,
show examples
 they become one of the members of the
school
, they meet other people
Correct word choice
and started
show examples
started
Wrong verb form
start
show examples
 to make
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
 friend and at
these
Correct determiner usage
this
show examples
 time
school
 become a place that they should learn from to how they should even face they problems in
school
 they start to work as a team with other
children
, in
this
 situation beginning to learn teamwork.
Although
 both
parents
 and
school
 at the same time teach
children
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
how they should do in their life but in different
position
Fix the agreement mistake
positions
show examples
. In conclusion, I would say it’s not just
parents
 or just
school
,
children
 must learn from both of them,
parents
 teach the first necessary thing and
school
 teach a second thing and
start
Add the particle
start to
show examples
 teach team working, so both of them are important to
children
 to become a good member of society
Submitted by bayatz80 on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • good members of society
  • teach
  • parents
  • schools
  • responsibility
  • values
  • respect
  • empathy
  • responsibility
  • formal education
  • citizenship
  • ethics
  • social responsibility
  • lead by example
  • role models
  • conducive environment
  • extracurricular activities
  • community involvement
  • collaborate
  • holistic approach
What to do next:
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