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Band 4

Some people believe that a country will benefit greatly if its students study abroad. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #country #benefit #students #study
It is believed that studying abroad
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 of great benefit t their home countries. In my opinion, I
wholl
Correct your spelling
will
 agree with
this
 idea because
students
 studying in another
country
 make the
country
 flourish successfully.
This
 essay will analyse both sides of
this
 view to clarify the conclusion. On the one hand, international
students
 can benefit their home
country
 in economic and societal terms.
For example
,
students
 who have finished their study abroad
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can use specialist knowledge to work for or open their own companies with high chances of sustainable success taking up
creativity
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creative
show examples
 jobs as well as contributing to their countries. It can be seen that if they learn the knowledge of these countries, they will adapt it and make the innovation. These
Correct your spelling
innovations
inovations
Correct your spelling
innovations
 would change their
country
 and give it an edge over other nations.
On the other hand
, the large number of
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 who
initially
go
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goes
show examples
 internationally for educational purposes may decide to settle because of
progressive
Add an article
the progressive
show examples
 living
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
 of other regions and they do not return
having
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
after being abroad.
For instance
, as the result from UK new the living
country
 offer a stable enough career prospect, and the pay
very
Add a missing verb
is very
show examples
 high.
Correct your spelling
Therefore
show examples
Therefor
Correct your spelling
Therefore
show examples
 they do not want to return because
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the infrastructure here is good. In conclusion, I strongly agree that the benefits that study abroad
students
brings
Change the verb form
bring
show examples
 to their home
country
 are undeniable.
However
, we should have some policies to ensure that these
students
 will be more likely to return after graduating.
Submitted by thaothanh1323 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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