Some people think that sport teaches children how to compete, while others believe that children learn teamwork. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #sport #children #teamwork

Sports

are commonplaces among adolescents and

children

, there are classes at school or facilities

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the public to encourage

children

to do

sports

. While people have

Replace the word

divergent

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diverge

Correct your spelling

diverse

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opinions on sporting can encourage

children

to compete or to work as a team, I believe both of these

benefit

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benefits

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can be learnt by

children

through

sporting

Replace the word

sport

show examples

. From the perspective of learning to compete.

Sports

like Swimming or running are both competitive

sports

while

players

are require

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are required

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to fight for their own. Swimming competitions are usually a solo versus event, where

players

will stimulate their adrenaline and fight for the

first

spot. Winners tend to fulfil their satisfaction when it is a solo sport.

Hence

, they will become more prepared and competitive for the

game, in terms to satisfy their thrives for winning. From the perspective of learning teamwork. Basketball is a great example

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of to

show examples

define team-based

sports

Fix the agreement mistake

sport

show examples

For instance

, in a basketball game,

players

are required to follow the playbooks and play tactics that the coach has planned.

Additionally

, these tactics often include basic skills like passing,

furthermore

, some team-based expertise like "pick and roll". All

players

have to be

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

team

player

Fix the agreement mistake

players

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for a chance of winning.

Conversely

, a selfish player that does not pass the ball or follow coaches'

demand

Fix the agreement mistake

demands

show examples

will lead the team to lose.

Therefore

children

will learn to bond with teammates if they are determined to win. To conclude, the fulfilment of winning at a sport can

boosted

Wrong verb form

boost

show examples

children

's competitive minds and help

introducing

Wrong verb form

introduce

show examples

teamwork. And both of these are the attribution for victory.

Submitted by jackyyung0613 on Wed Sep 14 2022

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

258 words

5.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 9.0

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Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people think that sport teaches children how to compete, while others believe that children learn teamwork. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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The government should ban smoking in all public places even though this would restrict some other people’s freedom?Do you agree or disagree?

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Many governments think that economic progress is the most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important for a country. Disscuss both these views and give your opinion.

Many governments think that economic progress is their most important goal. Some people, however, think that other types of progress are equally important. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.