IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Climate change is now an accepted threat to our planet but there is not enough political action to control excessive consumerism and pollution do you agree ?

#climate #change #threat #planet #action #control #consumerism #pollution
I am writing to refer to your care Ms Naomi Barnes, who has had Diabetes Mellitus type 2 since 2015. She requires your management and monitoring. Her laboratory results are as follows: FBS 205 mmol/L, HBA1c 12.2 per cent her BMI is 29.8. She was
then
 referred to a general practitioner, who
then
 prescribed oral hypoglycemics,
however
, she is not compliant.
In addition
, she cooks her own meals on weekends cereals, pasta, bread and frozen meals.
Hence
, during weekends she opted for a meal delivery service. It is beneficial for Ms Barnes if you could advise her to comply with her regular medication.
Additionally
, prepare a diabetic meal plan and recommend a healthy meal for her to aid in the reduction of her weight and manage her diabetes. Please monitor her blood sugar levels. She is known to be a chain smoker and she was extremely busy at her work.
Subsequently
, her alcohol intake is increased since her husband passed away in 2020. Encourage her to limit her alcohol intake and monitor her consumption. It is
also
 highly appreciated if you could introduce her to a local smoking cessation program. I would be grateful if you could refer her to a general practitioner to rule out peripheral neuropathy. If you have any questions, do not hesitate to contact me.
Submitted by d_jayson08 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: