It is very important that children should study hard at school. Time spent playing sport is time wasted. Do you agree?

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These days, it is debatable

that

Correct word choice

whether

show examples

children should prioritize intensive study in the classroom rather than spending time on

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

, which some people believe

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

wastes valuable time for learning.

While

Linking Words

others including me reckon that sport is one of the most crucial subjects that should be taught in school

due to

Linking Words

various benefits. In

this

Linking Words

essay, the reasons to support my disagreement with the statement will be explained in the following paragraphs. First of all, athletics can be

the

Correct article usage

show examples

opportunity to better the well-being of many students. As kids who are experts in a particular sport will be always supported by many sponsors and get scholarships for athletes, they can access higher education for a better future.

Moreover

Linking Words

, sports can generate a huge amount of income to feed themselves and family.

For example

Linking Words

, Lenado Messi, an eminent soccer player in Argentina, generates 2 million dollars for playing only

2 hours

Correct your spelling

2-hour

matches.

Furthermore

Linking Words

according to

Change preposition

show examples

the

Change the word

their

his

her

show examples

interview

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

him

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

, he revealed that football has absolutely changed his life because it

can transform

Wrong verb form

transformed

show examples

his poor life to become the most successful football player in history, which can afford anything in the world.

Secondly

Linking Words

, athletics plays a vital role in improving the mental and physical health of children compared to hard study, which only provides anxiety and stress to kids.

In other words

Linking Words

, exercise can relieve unpleasant feelings of monotony. From my experience, cardio

at the end

Linking Words

of the day can eliminate my concern about boring and pressured work.

In addition

Linking Words

, working out by weight training can enhance my physical body and elevate my confidence. As people who frequently exercise have better health and shape than those who always sit in front of the table, they are prone to be more confident and make everyday life even better. In conclusion,

according to

Linking Words

the aforementioned advantages of sports consisting of getting a good chance in improving livelihood and getting better mental and physical health, I strongly agree that sports is as important as studying classroom, and should not be considered as wasted time activities.

pantamitsaekongSat Sep 17 2022

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coherence cohesion

Ensure that the introduction provides a clear overview of the essay's main points and the conclusion summarizes the key arguments presented. Use linking words and phrases to improve the coherence of ideas. Make sure that ideas are logically organized and support the main argument effectively.

task response

Make sure to fully address all parts of the essay prompt with comprehensive ideas and arguments. Also, ensure that examples are relevant and support the main points effectively.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

342 words

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It is very important that children should study hard at school. Time spent playing sport is time wasted. Do you agree?

In the modern era, governments have been significantly investing vast sums in artworks. Some proponents argue that this substantial artistic investment could be more judiciously directed towards other essential sectors.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discubss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is not necessary to travel to other places to learn about other cultures of other people. We can learn just as much from books, films, and the internet. Do you agree or disagree?

Many parents complain that computer games have no value to their chuldren’s Study. On the contrary , those online games have produced a lot of negative effect on their mental and physical development. What is your opinion

Many governments have laws that ban the sale and use of hard drugs such as heroin and cocaine, yet they allow people to buy drugs such as tobacco and alcohol. Laws that prohibit the sale and use of hard drugs should be applied to all drugs, including tobacco and alcohol. What is your opinion?