Some think that it is more important for children to engage in outdoor activities instead of playing videogames. To what extent to you agree or disagree?

#think #children #activities #videogames

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

In the present day,a few people believe that it is essential for adolescents to play outdoor

games

rather than participate in video

games

.I partially agree with

this

thought and

this

essay will discuss the reasons with adequate examples.

To begin

, optimal physical growth is an important positive effect of

this

argument.Engaging in physical activity puts the muscles into a phase of contraction and relaxation with subsequent burning of fats.

This

leads to extensive musculoskeletal development.To illustrate,research studies in the year 2019 reveal that 50%-70% of the kids who play outdoor

games

have rapid growth spurts.

Thus

,they are taller than their counterparts.

Also

,physical activity reduces the risk of disease occurrence. Field plays facilitate the release of hormones

such

as lipoprotein and

also

anti-oxidants like vitamins A,C and E which are all involved in the prevention of illness.

For example

, playing field sports 3 times a week decreases the tendency of having cardiovascular disease by 20%.

Therefore

this

enables the young lads to have a healthy lifestyle.

Hence

, outdoor

games

are highly beneficial and should be encouraged.

On the other hand

,the engagement of youngsters in video

games

improves brain development. The neuronal circuits of the brain are mostly replicated when challenged with fast-paced activities

such

home

plays.

For instance

,studies showed that 10-15mins play of

home

games

by minors increases the development of brain cells by 20%.

This

results in the better assimilation of information and learning.

Thus

,children should be advised to participate in the playing of

home

games

for at least

10mins

Correct your spelling

10 minutes

daily. In my opinion, I believe on average that sports are important because of their ability to enhance physical strength and endurance. Daily play of these

games

results in hypertrophy of muscle fibres which is paramount in obtaining energy and resilience. Certain illustrations have shown that the minors that have more strength are the ones whose parents allow them to play sports in the garden.

Also

, the role of televised

games

in the relaxation of kids should not be overlooked. Partaking in

this

game brings so much laughter and joy. News media reported that 90% of happy children are the ones that play

home

games

30mins

Correct your spelling

30 minutes

daily before bedtime. In conclusion, outdoor plays are important

due to

their numerous benefits

such

as enhancement of body growth and reduction in the risk of diseases.

However

,televised

games

are beneficial since they improve the kids' intellect.

As a result

this

, youngsters should be encouraged to engage in both

games

Submitted by vnwekwe on Tue Sep 20 2022

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement

Your response addresses the topic but could benefit from a more focused argument. Ensure your main points directly relate to the question and avoid irrelevant information.

Coherence and Cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are strong and clearly present. Make sure to maintain this clarity and structure throughout the essay for better coherence and cohesion.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

398 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Schools should focus on academic success and passing examinations. Skills such as cookery, dressmaking and woodwork should not be taught at school as it is better to learn these from family and friends. To that extent do you agree or disagree. You should write at least 250 words.
There are many thing that students should learn when they are young, skill and academic knowledge. There is an idea that schools should provide and focus only academic success, and abandon skills, which are cooking, dressing, and woodworking for example, development because children should learn them from their family and friends. From my point of view, I do not agree with this statement, and the reasons will be explained in the following paragraphs.
6.5
band
The best way to reduce poverty in developing countries is by giving up to six years of free education, so that they can at least read, write and use numbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In recent times, it is usually believed that the government setting up free learning for six years is the superior way to reduce poverty in developing countries. In my view, I completely agree with this statement because of the free schooling, residents have the opportunity to learn the fundamental knowledge, contributing to the growth of the country.
7
band
Governments should spend more money on education than on recreation and sports. Do you agree or disagree?
It is argued that countries should allocate more funds to education than to leisure and competitive games. It is agreed that national budgets should prioritise schools and universities over sports and play. First, I will discuss the economic benefits that education can bring to a nation and, secondly, its social benefits.
4.5
band
Some people believe that cell phones should be for personal use only; others,  however, feel cell phones should be used mostly for work.    Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
Whilst some belive that mobile phones can only use for personal purpose, others say that this communication device should be used besides personal such as work. I also argue that mobiles should use for work purposes too.
<4
band
Some people believe that it is important to give gifts to friends and family to show that we care about them. Others think that there are better ways to show that we care. Discuss both views and give your opinion ?
It is often argued that many people believe that it is essential to give presents to friends and family to show that we take care of them.Other people say that there are better ways to show that we care.In my opinion,it is important two process as attention.

Some think that it is more important for children to engage in outdoor activities instead of playing videogames. To what extent to you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

The best way to reduce poverty in developing countries is by giving up to six years of free education, so that they can at least read, write and use numbers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Governments should spend more money on education than on recreation and sports. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that cell phones should be for personal use only; others, ​however, feel cell phones should be used mostly for work.​ Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe that it is important to give gifts to friends and family to show that we care about them. Others think that there are better ways to show that we care. Discuss both views and give your opinion ?

Some people believe that cell phones should be for personal use only; others,  however, feel cell phones should be used mostly for work.    Discuss both views and give your own opinion.