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Band 7

The young today spend a large amount of their leisure time in shopping centers. It is feared that this trend can bring negative influences on the youths and the society. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this view?

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The youngest generation in current
society
 prefers to spend most of their
time
 in some amusement locations
such
 as shopping
centres
instead
 of working hard or focusing on reaching high achievement in education as best as they can just for good memory. While some peoples tend to believe the idea of shopping is the waste of
time
 and it will screw up your life. I mostly agree with the idea of negative influence will come up with but I can
also
 understand why youths and
society
 have
this
 kind of habit.
To begin
 with, most youth populations
such
 as teenagers, and university students usually have much more leisure
time
 compared with the middle-aged communities who already get into a real
society
 for 2 decades or even more.
Moreover
, some professors believe that spending a large amount of
time
 in shopping
centres
 can actually accumulate knowledge and develop our logic when people are making a decision or seeing things they have never seen before.
Therefore
, it seems to be more reasons why most young population prefer to enjoy the rest of their day in shopping
centres
 as they can see some new things from shopping
centres
 from different perspectives which are the things they can't learn in school.
On the other hand
, some professional talents in career development mention that people might lose their ability to work productivity and efficiency day after day if they spend too much
time
 on amusement. The reason for that could be the young generation will start to forget their current identity as a student or people who just step into
society
. Ultimately, they will become a lazy person who doesn't even know what to do or what goal to achieve for the rest of their life. To conclude, spending
time
 with friends or families in a shopping centre is always an option for indoor activities, but once you spend too much
time
 that you are not supposed to be spending,
then
 it will bring you many more negative influences than you thought.
Submitted by stevenhuang9510 on

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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