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Band 6

The leaders of most organizations tend to be older people. However, some argue that younger people make better bosses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#leaders #organizations #people #argue #bosses
It is often argued that the higher
position
 of a company should be
holby
Change the capitalization
Holby
show examples
 an older member while some believe that youngsters can do
this
 job better. I firmly agree with the latter and
this
 essay will shed the light on my opinion. In my opinion, I completely agree with the statement that young people are more up-to-date about the modern world and flexible to
work
.
First
 of all, young people are significantly energetic,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
show examples
 them to hold
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
leading
position
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 any organization. They are physically and mentally strong enough, which makes them eager to take
any
Change preposition
on any
show examples
 new challenges and overcome
with
Correct pronoun usage
them with
show examples
 new experiments and resources.
Such
 characteristics are highly encouraged by other employees of the organization, and they are very keen
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 their
work
. That helps to company’s development.
For example
, nowadays we can see
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the newspaper that the young generation
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 highly encouraged to hold any political
position
 or managing director
position
 in any multinational
companies
Fix the agreement mistake
company
show examples
. Young executives are
Add a hyphen
open-minded
show examples
open minded
Add a hyphen
open-minded
show examples
 as they are willing to accept new ideas for
growth
Add an article
the growth
show examples
 of the company.
Secondly
, young managers are very passionate about the latest technological innovations, so they are always up-to-date,
how
Change preposition
on how
show examples
 the world is progressing day by day. They are very much used to
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the latest technology,
such
 as
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
show examples
, smartphone, laptop, tab etc., which makes their
work
 easier, even
they
Correct word choice
if they
show examples
 are working
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
remotely. It saves their important time as well.
For example
, many advertising
company
Change to a plural noun
companies
show examples
 get
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
idea
Fix the agreement mistake
ideas
show examples
 from
Internet
Add an article
the Internet
show examples
 and promote their product in an innovative way.
Thus
, the youth can change the traditional way of thinking and bring the organization to a profitable
position
. To conclude, I strongly believe that
young
Correct article usage
the young
show examples
 generation
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 more capable
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
managing
position
 than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
older people because they are dynamic and
Add a hyphen
forward-thinking
show examples
forward thinking
Add a hyphen
forward-thinking
show examples
 at their
work
, which demands
for
Remove the preposition
apply
show examples
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
leadership.
Submitted by tofabd on

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • strategic decision-making
  • crisis management
  • innovative ideas
  • adaptable
  • tech-savvy
  • digital transformation
  • complex situations
  • high-pressure decisions
  • empathy
  • patience
  • strategic foresight
  • authoritative
  • collaborative work culture
  • dynamic
  • inclusive organizational culture
  • ageism
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